MIL wants pastor. We don't.

posted 3 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
5697 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

You give her some time to just get over it. It’s not her wedding or decision.

Post # 4
Member
4641 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@Haruyou:  Unless she’s paying, she can cry all she wants. Its your wedding.

Post # 6
Member
1093 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Well, is it her wedding or yours? Unless she is paying for the wedding, pay her no mind

Post # 7
Member
3713 posts
Sugar bee

I have a feeling this isn’t the first, nor will be the last time, that she cries to try to get her own way. If she’s that uncomfortable with the situation, she does have the option to stay home.

Post # 8
Member
585 posts
Busy bee

It’s your wedding. Not hers. The best thing is that you and your FI agree. He needs to tell her to back off. Politely, of course.

My MIL wanted a Catholic ceremony, but I am not Catholic and have no desire to be, and my FI is not religious. She eventually got over it, and while every time we talk of our outdoor ceremony with a hired officiant I can see her cringe a little, she know’s it’s what we both want.

Post # 10
Member
3960 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@Haruyou:   She has no say in the matter.   

Post # 11
Member
3960 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@Haruyou:   Just saw your last post – we cross posted.  🙂  You don’t need to say anything to her.  From what you’ve said I don’t think any reason would suffice anyway.

She will have to accept your choice.   You are not responsible for her feelings.  

Post # 12
Member
2895 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@Haruyou:  You can’t get Pastor, and that is just kind of that.  There is not a whole lot she can do about it.

The only compromise option I can think of is if she or another family member would like to say a pre-authorized blessing at your wedding.  An Irish Blessing is always a great one for a non-religious wedding when wanting to appease the religious. 

Post # 14
Member
3960 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@Haruyou:   So sorry for the pressure you are getting from her.  She “needs” to back off!  It’s not her wedding!   

Post # 16
Member
3960 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@Haruyou:   Perhaps if she doesn’t succeed with you she will move on to her daughter.  Is she like this with other things, or is it just wedding related issues?

 

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