[Mild rant] Does your SO constantly ruin your sleep?

posted 3 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
2381 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Ugh!  My hubby and cat both keep me awake MANY nights!  He’s the worst sleeper ever 🙁

Post # 4
Member
478 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Oh you are so not being a jerk! He could watch them in another room, and then come to bed. Or he could watch them with headphones plugged into the laptop, with the lamp off!! (This is what my partner does). Why do you need a lamp to watch tv?

Ugh you can probably tell I would so not put up with this. But I’m a bit of a bitch. And I need my sleep so I’m not a mega bitch!

Sidenote, my fiance does keep me up though, not his fault though, he’s just a very active sleeper!

Post # 5
Member
480 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

Aww 🙁 I’m sorry! I’m on the opposite side; I’m more like your BF. I can sleep with any lights and sounds. It frustrated me in college when I had to shut everything down when it was time for my roommate to sleep, because I didn’t need/want her to do the same for me. But people are just different & I know it can be tough living with someone who has different sleeping needs. I’m sorry you’re going through that :/ *hugs!* I hope you get some rest tonight! 

& I agree with PPs that you are definitely not being unreasonable! Even though I was frustrated having to turn everything off for my roommate, I understood that she needed me to so that she could sleep. He should respect your needs!

Post # 6
Member
4698 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Except for VERY rare instances, we don’t allow tvs or computers in the bedroom if we’re both in there. Phones are fine, the inconvenience of using them for anything other than the basics keeps us off them for the most part (we have smartphones but they are SO FREAKING SLOW.)

If one of us is going to do something TV or game related, they are expected to do itin the living room. I only take my computer in the bedroom when I’m alone.

It’s not like an official policy, it just kind of happened that way and it helps a lot with those issues.

Usually I’m the annoying him at night – waking him because I had a horrible nightmare (I have a problem with nightmares) or because I always get up at night to go to the bathroom. The only way he ever damages my sleep is if he refuses to come to bed until late and I’m already anxious for some reason so it’s harder to sleep without him.

Post # 7
Member
1090 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@KhaleesiStormborn:  I think this will be my fate, too, after we’re married and living together. FI does the same thing every night, falls asleep with the TV and light on. It’s an ongoing conversation for us, but I’m asking that we not have a TV in the bedroom so that it doesn’t bother me (I’m not a light sleeper, but I get nightmares when I fall asleep with any background noise around me).

Is that a possibility for you? Could he just watch TV outside and come inside before he falls asleep? I know that’s probably easier said than done though…I dunno, good luck!

Post # 9
Member
4216 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Hi, sleep tech here. Your husband sounds like a sleep disorder case. Between the snoring, the twitching and the falling asleep fast I’d say there’s  cause for concern.

Post # 11
Member
1346 posts
Bumble bee

Yeah, he falls asleep before me most nights and kicks his legs a lot, he also tends to find himself most comfortable in the middle- which is weird because we have a floor model mattress so my half is soft and his is firm- the middle is awkward.

Post # 13
Member
1234 posts
Bumble bee

@KhaleesiStormborn:  (Side note: Love your screenname!!!)

I think he’s the one being a jerk. Why can’t he use headphones or go in another room? What does he expect you to do. You can’t help that you need quiet and darkness to sleep, but he can help the fact that he wants to watch TV. You’re not getting irritated with him for snoring or something. It’s also the fact he’s not compromising. There should always be compromise in a relationship, even over little things.

Post # 14
Member
4216 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@KhaleesiStormborn:  they’re just when he first drifts? That may just be sleep starts. But the snoring that’s loud enough to keep you awake is an issue. Plus his tv sleep habits. I think it would be worth looking into good luck 

Post # 15
Member
2189 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2017

I’m like you, and I don’t let people mess with my sleep. Snoring and uncontrollable acts is one thing, however the Tv and light would be vetoed. Give him a time and after that lights off. You need sleep, he’s being selfish and rude.

 

 

 

Post # 16
Member
435 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

@KhaleesiStormborn:  OMFG! This is probably THE  biggest bone of contention in the Pambi household! I am the lightest sleeper in Canada, and I also REQUIRE 8 straight hours of sleep, or EVERYONE will pay dearly. My FI  is my sleep antithesis, he is snoring before his head hits the pillow and can do just fine on 4-6 hours. He’ll go to bed at least 1 hour after I do, is seemingly incapable of just quietly slipping into and out of bed and often forgets to turn off his 5 am alarm clock, waking me up. RAGE!!

But when I get super stressed out, in the middle of the night I’ll do crazy crap in my sleep, like wake him up to help me find an imaginary animal in our room, or even to pick and imaginary fight! He puts up with my craziness, so I guess I can tolerate his oafishness…I guess.

 

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