Post # 1
I am so happy that I found this website! This is my first post and I feel that I can be completely honest and nobody will criticize or judge me.
I have been with my boyfriend for about 1 1/2 years and I know that it is not the right time for us to getting engaged. Here is the basic information about us:
Ages: Both of us are 34 years old.
Jobs: Both of us have Full Time Jobs. He is in the Government and I work in the Private Sector.
Schools: He is finishing law school and taking the bar exam by Summer July 2011 and I will finish my graduate programs also by Summer 2011.
I know that it makes TOTAL SENSE and it is COMPLETELY LOGICAL that we need to wait until both of us finish school but since we had out 1 year anniversary, I have been wanting to get engaged.
My logical part of my brain is telling me that I need to wait until next year. In addition, we are saving money for our Christmas trip: Greece! In addition, he needs to save money for the last semester in law school. But my heart is aching so much to be engaged.
Post # 3
I don’t have one of those timelines( it’s different) but I totally feel you. I won’t be 30 til April, but I’m quite anxious. 🙂
Post # 4
I completely understand! My situation is somewhat similar, my SO wants to finish school before getting married. Problem: he isn’t in school now! He has one more semester left and then is off to medical school. So I’ve tried to reason with him… “Who says we have to get married before you finish school? I was talking engagement!” Okay that’s not good reasoning skills, but I’m someone who wouldn’t mind a long engagement, that way we could be officially progressing our relationship but still reach our individual goals before actually being married. Win-win situation, which is why I’m saying by December 2011!
Post # 5
Um, I’m 32 and I know that it might come out somehow but here goes: When I was in my 20’s, I never gave much thought to time. I even met my FI when I was in my 20’s but 4 years later, I turned 32 and I had to be like “Huh, what’s going on? I need some stability and need to know where we are heading” He’s off to grad school now BUT I didn’t want to wait. So all’s I’m saying is, I feel you.
Post # 6
Yeah, I know how you feel. I’m 31 and my SO is 30. We are all done with school and working now so at least you two have reasons. I think just being in your 30s brings more presure to the situation. For me I put DEC 2010. I’m really working on making sure that my SO actually wants to be married and have children soon!! When we were in school and starting our careers I did not think of it as much because we were so busy plus we were young. Now I can’t stop thinking about it!! I think that if you are not in a rush to get married (ie – wanting to have children with him soon) then waiting is probably the best thing to do from your situation. Just make sure he knows that you are thinking about it and I would talk about it too so it doesn’t come as a big surprise for him when you are ready for the plung!! Welcome to the hive.
Post # 7
Talk to HIM about the timeline. HE is the ONLY one who can give you that answer. Does he want to be engaged? Have you discussed this? What is his timeline? What is his reasoning behind the timeline? These are all really important questions you should have answers to if you are considering marriage.
Post # 8
I’m hoping by the end of the year. I’m 34 and the clock is a ticking away. I’m ready to settle down and have a family. I want to get married by next October (when I will be 35).
Post # 9
I won’t be 30 until March, but I voted anyways. 🙂 My FH is 31, and just started his career in September after finishing his PhD. I voted for Dec 2011, but the actual timeline is more like May/June 2011. He took a job in Vancouver, and I am still in Ohio finishing school. I told him I was happy to relocate (I’m actually a Canadian citizen since I was born there) but I made it very clear I wouldn’t move until we were engaged. I finish school in May, so that’s sort of the timeframe we’re looking at.