Post # 1
Well, Bees, it’s done. I am too exhausted at the moment to go into detail, but I ended my relationship with FI and it was by far the most painful and difficult thing I have ever had to do. Fortuntely, I’ve gotten lots of support from friends and family – even my boss – and people are now starting to tell me that while they always really liked my now ex-FI, they wondered how our relationship was going to work in the long run. Funny how you hear other people’s doubts after the fact. Anway, we ended on good enough terms and said that one day, years down the road, we could probably be friends since we have been each other’s best friend all along. I hope to never have to go through something like this again. The worst part was seeing his pain. I haven’t cried that much… well, ever. There is a part of me that fears one day I’ll wake up and realize I made a mistake letting go of this man who loves me so dearly, but that’s a chance I’ll have to accept. Right now, even though I still hurt, it feels like it was the right thing to do. Thank you for your support, Bees!
Post # 3
i’m so sorry. it sounds like you did the right thing though, and i’m sure with time you’ll find the man that’s perfect for you. i can’t believe people are telling you they doubted your relationship — totally inappropriate!
Post # 4
@Mizerable: Good luck on all yoru new adventures!! 🙂 You made a tough choice and I am sure (or hope!) it was the right one!! **hugs**
Post # 5
Best of luck, honey. We are all pulling for you. Go get a massage!
Post # 6
Hugs! You definitely made the right decision, and it was brave of you to do so.
Post # 7
I just want to let you know that my thoughts are with you. Best of luck in the future.
Post # 8
@Mizerable: Oh, I am so sorry that you had to do that, but you did the right thing, right now. (Honestly, I had to do the same thing 4 weeks ago, and the pain is unbelievable). In times like these, you need to trust in a few cliched sayings, and those are ‘time heals all wounds’ and ‘if it’s meant to be it will be’. You have to believe that if this man is meant to be your husband, it will happen, someday.
Now just take the time you need to relax and sort things out for yourself, and make yourself happy. Like you, my ex-FI and I remain friends, because ultimately, that’s what we’ve always been, and I hope always will be.
Best wishes. You’ll get through this.
Post # 9
I think you did the right thing and I hope the pain eases soon! I’m so sorry you had to do this!
Post # 10
🙁 So sorry you are going thru this…But, as I’m sure you know, you will be ok 🙂
Post # 11
So sorry you are going through all this right now. Stay strong and keep your head up! Good luck!
Post # 12
Thank you all! Right now, I just try hard not to think about FI too much or worry about how he is doing. I find that when I do that, I just get depressed all over again. I realize I cannot spend any more energy on this as it has already consumed me for almost 5 months now as it is.
@SnugglesKD: How do you feel about your decision now that a month has passed since you and your ex parted ways? I am thinking that since you still remain friends he wasn’t too devastated about it in the sense that he no longer wanted contact with you. I really do want to be friends with my ex one day and maybe, as you said, if it’s truly meant to be, we will get back together. But right now we both feel it’s best if we have little to no contact while we both heal.
Post # 13
Years ago I split with a man I had been with for more than ten years. While it was heartbreaking, looking back, it was the best decision for both of us. He cheated on me, and it took me more than a year before I could even talk to him with tears. In time our friendship returned. We went through so much together that I could not see him ever not being apart of my life. I still talk to him to this day. Now I am happy with the FH and never regret my decisions. It will take time, but it does get better. Just allow yourself to grieve, only moving through the process will you get to a new beginning. Good Luck
Post # 14
OMG! I am so sorry to hear this. I cannot imagine your pain. You did what is right for you. And you had the courage to go through with it.
To the PP: It is NEVER easy on the guy or even ‘easier’ when you break up with the man that loves you. He can show you that he is strong for your own sake mostly but deep down inside he has been SEVERELY damaged. He might even go on to have questionable relationships now. Believe me, the boy is f**ked.
Post # 15
@Sasha2011: Yes, I agree that he is suffering grately. A break up is never easy. And I do hurt for him – I was the one who bawled for the entire day when it happened. He didn’t shed a tear. However, ultimately it is better than for me to unfairly lead him on and pretend that I could give him the same love he was giving me. Had I done that, the end result would have been even more disasterous. Fortunately, my ex is very close with his family and I know they will help see him through this. He also believes strongly in God and spiritual support and healing. I do hope that his future relationships aren’t questionable, but I cannot concern myself with that. I will always love him dearly, but it is because I love him that I could not continue to essentially live a lie.