Missing RSVPs – when to start contacting

posted 3 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 2
7657 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

Kacie209:  If your RSVP dtae is September 19, I would wait until the 20th, at the earliest, to start calling people. If you can wait until Monday, that might be beneficial in case someone sent their RSVP on the due date. Honestly, though, most people that didn’t RSVP by such and such date more than likely forgot and wouldn’t have mailed their’s out by Friday. Just what I picked up on with my own RSVPs.

Post # 3
8588 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

Mine are due on the 30th, and I plan to wait 3 or 4 business days to start contacting them so I can get those who put them in the mail on the 29th/30th.

Post # 4
3051 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2015 - Walnut Hill Bed & Breakfast

I think you have to wait until at least the ‘due date’.  Maybe post something on facebook as a reminder in case some might see it there and they forgot?

Post # 5
2843 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

Kacie209:  Wait until the deadline has passed.  We had them all come in– but same as you– they came in quickly at first, slower later on– there were a total of 2 that never came in, but there were logical reasons why and they were people we never in a million thought would come.  Sort of “displaced” family, if you will.


But we had our last one come in ON the day of the deadline.  There’s no reason to have a dealine if you are going to start contacting people before, ya know?

I know it’s nicer to have all your ducks in a row– but just wait until at least the day after!

Post # 7
11082 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2014

Kacie209:  I would wait until you get the mail on Monday and then start checking with people.  We had a whole bunch come in in the last few days.  People also don’t always see the RSVP date as the date you want it in you hands – a lot of people look at is as a mail by date.

Post # 9
1959 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

Kacie209:  I checked the mail on my RSVP date and then called everyone that same day.

Post # 10
1877 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

amberback:  Unless you are inviting your ENTIRE facebook friends list, it would be inappropriate to post anything on facebook. I know plenty of people do this, but it always rubs me the wrong way as it’s bound to hurt the feelings of those people not invited.

Post # 12
1110 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

Mine are actually due back today and we’re missing about 25 RSVPs.  I’m going to give it an extra couple of days before I start emailing and calling guests since some may have waited until the due date to send them out.

On another note, I just want to say how annoying it is to have to chase people down for an RSVP!  All it involves is checking either “Yes” or “No” and dropping it off in the mailbox.  C’mon, people!

Post # 15
7513 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

I’d give it a few days after the actual RSVP date. A lot of people will probably wait until the last minute to mail them out.

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