Post # 1
So I am torn between having the bridal party+their spouse/date/whatever sitting at three tables around my sweetheart table- there are 7 BM and 7 GM, so that’s almost three full tables right there. Or should I mix them around the room with other people? I’m also considering mixing up the families and friends so that people can mingle with those they already know during cocktail hour, but then are forced to make friends during dinner… I think this will help everyone feel more comfortable dancing later on!! Am I wrong here? We have about 160 people, pretty evenly split between our two families and groups of friends. Advice please! 🙂
Post # 3
I think that if you want to mix up your bridal party amongst the guests you can, although I would keep them together.
But I really advise against splitting up friends/family and making them sit with strangers. As a guest, I really really hate that. I like going to weddings because its a chance to get together with your friends and family, some of which you may have not seen for a long time and its great to sit with them. Meeting the other side of the family, its probably the only time you will run into one another. So there might be two circles of people dancing on the dance floor, doesn’t matter. Plus alcohol always helps people mingle anyways!
Post # 4
@MrsPeachMartini: I think sitting your wedding party with their significant others close to you is the best idea. I would want to keep my wedding party close by. I would try to seat family or people together who know one another where I could. People aren’t going to sit at the table all night, I’m sure they’ll find there way over to those they want to socialize with.
Post # 5
I would keep the bridal party together and also seat people who know each other together personally.
Post # 6
I’m mixing the bridal party in with people they know. I guess I don’t see the point in keeping them together for dinner when they will know – and may have more fun sitting with – other people at the reception.
Post # 7
I would seat people that know eachother together, and if that means your wedding party sits together, keep them together. Also consider who is making a toast, so that they don’t have to walk from the back of the room.
Don’t “force” people to make friends with strangers. That’s like grade school when you were supposed to “branch out”.
Post # 8
for your bridal party, i think either way is fine. i’m splitting up my bridal party, at least the girls anyway. none of them really know each other (one is my cousin and the other 2 are friends of mine from 2 difference circles) and i don’t want them to be bored or feel weird sitting with people they don’t know. the groomsmen know each other, so we may have them sitting together.
for the rest of the guests, i think it would be better to seat them with at least some people they know. i wouldn’t fill a table with people who are total strangers to each other.
Post # 9
I’ll be doing a Sweetheart table to I plan on having my wedding party sit with their dates/friends/family. I’m just going to incorporate them to the seating chart as if they were any other guest. Luckily they all know each other and are friends so they’ll most likely all be sitting together anyway with their dates.
Post # 10
I would be against mixing random guests together, you want the guests to have fun first and foremost and that’s not just about dancing. Guests who love to dance will hit the dance floor regardless, although it might take awhile to get the party started. What my friend did was asked us all extroverts to hit the dance floor right away when DJ announced dance floor was open, worked like a charm the floor was moving within half hr with grandma and grandpa grooving to the latest hip hop beats – but it depends on your guests, some weddings just don’t have the kind of guests who want to dance.
A friend of mine hired some dancers who dragged everyone onto the floor after the performance, another way but I feel sorry for some of the people being dragged. I wonder how they pick up on who to drag and who not to.
Post # 11
I mixed a lot of the bridal party in with the other guests. I figured since they knew so many of the people at the wedding, they could be ‘ambassadors’ of sorts for groups seated together who maybe didn’t know each other — cousins from opposite sides of the family, for example. That also meant that a couple that wasn’t in the wedding party ended up sitting with us at Table 1, because they didn’t know anyone else. Unconventional, maybe, but it worked and nobody complained!
Post # 12
I am anti head table as a wedding party member so I also skipped this as a bride. We kind of did both of what you mention but not to an extreme. We mixed the bridal party and their dates around the room but mostly at the tables closest to us. However it was intermingled such that one table consisted of my friend from college, 2 of whom happened to be bridal party members and 5 of whom not plus their dates. DH had a group of close knit friends from high school who traveled to the wedding without dates and knowing they were in the middle of a man vacation, I decided to split them up to other tables in an effort to get the 8 of them to meet my friends. Bit, I split them, 3, 3 and 2 so they still got to be together and the ones that were 2 sat iwth DH’s sister who they also know quite well. I split up my brothers from my parents and put each of our God parents with our parents instead with aunts/uncles. I tried to split up my mom’s cousins but that was the only group she suggested I sit together. I mixed some college friends with cousins and brothers. I hope that makes sense and helps give you an idea of what I mean by mixing in moderation. I think it worked well because there was a lot of intermixed group dancing later in the evening and his friends and my friends had just met for the first time so it was nice to see them having fun together.
I was just in a wedding that sat the bridal party in with guests and I loved it as I got to sit with a table full of high school friends I never see instead of bridesmaids I just met. But we were much more clicky this way as the whole table got up and danced together and the one BM who was seated with us that did not go to high school with us got lost in the mix. Only after did I realize she was not dancing with us 🙁 So it can backfire if you try to only partially mix people.
Post # 13
I personally hate it when couples take it upon themselves to force friendships at their wedding. I mean, you make a seating arrangement and I’ll park it where I’m told but being separated from my friends or family just because the couple wants to force me to get to know complete strangers is annoying. Get enough liquor in me and I’ll make friends with everybody anyway.
As for mixing the BP members in with the guests, I think that’s fine. Our friends did that at their wedding and it worked out great (especially for DH and I). We were both in the wedding so instead of having to sit at a dreaded head table (I loath them) or with the rest of the BP who we didn’t really know, we got to sit with our other friends who weren’t part of the wedding. It was perfect.
Post # 14
For the wedding party, I would say it depends on the group you have assembled. If they are all friends on a regular basis then they won’t mind sitting together, but if you and your DH are their only common factor than it might get awkward.
For us, my 4 BMs consisted of: 2 friends, my sister, and my SIL. We sat the 2 friends with their SO’s and with our other friends. And each sister sat with their cousins on the family side of the room. But, the groomsmen are all friends from the same group so they just all sat together at one table with their SO’s and a few of our other friends from the same group to fill the table up. So our wedding party was scattered around the reception.
As for the regular guests, when I am seated with random people at a wedding I end up not sitting in my seat and am off hanging out with my friends I do know at the bar…because we are all avoiding the awkward silence/conversations at our assigned tables.
Post # 15
We didn’t have a head table because we opted for a sweetheart table. We seated people with people they already know when possible. We scattered the bridal party across multiple tables, except for a few places where it made sense to seat them together due to their social connections.
Post # 16
I think you could go either way with the bridal party. With the regular guests, I think you should see them with people they know. The overall goal should be for your guests to be comfortable and have a good time, and sitting with people they know will encourage that.