Post # 1
My mother showed me what she would wear to the wedding and I think it’s too casual. It’s a mint green sundress with a matching cardigan and she would wear white sandals. I told her that I thought it was fine, but when I started looking online at MOB dresses I started second guessing what I told her. I don’t care about the color or length or anything like that, but I just don’t want her to feel underdressed compared to what the MOG is wearing which is a purple dress with some sparkles I think. My wedding is cocktail attire/black tie optional if that makes a difference. I’m getting married in the evening. Should I tell my mom that the dress is not ok? If so, how do I tell her what I think would be better? I don’t want her to spend a ton of money on a dress that she may only wear once. Should I buy it for her?
Post # 2
HCbee2014: I would send her a picture of the MOG dress and say “this is what MOG has picked out!” and see what she says. If she replies with a “Oh, pretty.” then leave it at that. If she replies with “Oh, it is much fancier than what I bought. Do you think I should get something else?” then you have the opportunity to weigh in and suggest something dressier.
Post # 3
Could it be dressed up with a shawl, heels and accessories?
Post # 4
I thnk it is fine. Too often here, we read about people trying to upstate the bride, wear white etc.
Post # 5
HCbee2014: I think it would be a lovely gesture to buy it for her. But yes you should tell her it’s too casual. Mint green, in general, doesn’t say cocktail time to me, especially with a cardigan.
Whats the harm in saying you realized you were wrong?
Post # 6
MissLibra: That’s a good idea.
morningcoffee: My mom has some really nice jewelry, but even that would only dress it up so much I think. I don’t know.
juanita.kelly.9: LOL definitely NOT my mom. She said several times that it’s all about me and my fiance on the wedding day so I think that might have played into her choice. I think she thinks she has less of a role than she really does.
coffeedrinker: No harm, I just wanted to double check and get some more opinions before I let my mom know that the dress may not be the best choice.
Post # 7
Do you have any pictures of the dress? I think she would appreciate it if you let her know something else might be better, and maybe go shopping together and offer to buy it for her. Save her the embarrassment of being undredressed, and you’ll both be happier!
Post # 8
Nothing is wrong with the color of the dress. It would really depend on the fabric and style. But to me, a sundress implies cotton or daytime material by definition, so yes, it sounds too casual. The white sandals and the cardigan also sound too casual.
FWIW, there is really no such official thing as black tie optional. There is formal or not formal. Black tie allows for an optional dark suit in any case. But even for what is commonly designated as black tie optional, her outfit does not sound dressy enough, especially for a mother. As I said on a recent thread, formality has nothing to do with embellishments or sequins. A simple gown can be just as dressy.