MOB thinks SHE is the bride??

posted 3 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
1926 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

UMMM…. WTF? 

Is this real life? Because your mom sounds like a mental patient… no offense. 

Post # 4
Member
2243 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

Sounds like you should have stepped up & defended your wedding a long time ago. Unfortunately, there’s not a lot I can see that can salvage this situation within the next week. 🙁 Sorry!

Post # 5
Member
6644 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Wow, why haven’t you stood up for yourself. You are kinda screwed now, after some 8 months of this.  Seriously that is messed up.  

Post # 7
Member
42460 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@mandauhhxo:  It’s a bit late to start standing up for yourself as far as the wedding is concerned. I hope you start soon as far as the rest of your life is concerned.

Post # 9
Member
2243 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

@mandauhhxo:  I’d cut mom out of my life in your circumstance. You’re going to be a married woman this time next week; It’s time to grow a pair & stop letting your mother control you.

Post # 10
Member
42460 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@mandauhhxo: I would change the reservation for the suite to a different name. Or, just grow a set and show up to the suite when you wanted to, not at a time she dictates.

Post # 11
Member
7195 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@mandauhhxo:  Is your mother paying for everything?

Perhaps you can bypass her, e.g. book your own suite; make changes to the ceremony/reception without telling her.

Post # 12
Member
2162 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

That is really freaking weird.

Post # 14
Member
1253 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

@mandauhhxo:  What?!?!?! Dang, if my mom were acting like this, I would kindly inform her “I am going to use my own money and elope. Since you apparently want to call all the shots and my opinion doesn’t matter, host your own damned wedding for no one.”

You aren’t being selfish, you’re mom is being crazy. Like unbelievably, I-had-a-daughter-to-live-vicariously-through-her crazy. You need to start standing up to her and calling the shots!

And to clarify, it’s too late to do that for the wedding, but I mean in your life. She acts this way because she knows you will let her. You obviously are terrified of conflict, but you need to just deal with it and let some conflict happen, or she will dictate your life forever, and it will wear down on you, and even more on your husband.

All it takes is one or two times of letting there be some unpleasantness, and when she sees you aren’t going to back down, she will. Maybe she’ll be mad and drop out of your life for a while, but I mean, at this point, is that such a bad thing?

Post # 15
Member
2243 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

@mandauhhxo:  AHA! What did you expect would happen? Captain hindsight says: if you didn’t want her to take over, you shouldn’t have let her pay for your wedding!

Post # 16
Member
193 posts
Blushing bee

wow.

 

I was and am going to be again a MOB…and under no circumstances would I do any of those things on your mothers list. In fact my daughter was worried i wasnt going to have enough time to get ready myself since the wedding was on our homestead so i was a little busy getting things ready. IMO thats just a little too much… did your mom not get a wedding when she got married, and now shes trying to make up for it? gaah, i dont know, even if thats her excuse… im sorry but shes not being a good mom.  heck not even a mom.

 

IMO If you owe her money, i suggest you pay her off promptly and never ever have any emotional or financial obligation to her ever again unless she changes – be a socially  extended family, but please do not let her into your marriage…

 

hugs to you and your honey, wishing all the best for your first day of marriage and the rest of your lives!

 

 

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