Post # 1
We are two weeks away from getting married. It will be extremely small (less than 30 people) and my mother just mentioned to me that she feels badly her cousin and her aunt are not invited. The problem is that my fiance has a total of two family members representing his side of the family and I will have at least nine representing me. We kept things small on purpose because he was uncomfortable with the severe imbalance in our representative numbers. Now my mother wants to add to that and has also told me that I have to call her other cousins to tell them we are getting married.
I don’t want to sound rude, but I have told her that this is our celebration and we have chosen who we want to celebrate with. I am not particularly close to her cousins or aunt, but have spent some family gatherings with them. They haven’t met my FH, but have maybe seen our pictures on facebook together.
I guess I am just looking for some last minute advice, information on etiquette, etc. so that I can sleep and we can enjoy the day. Sigh. Thanks bees!
Post # 3
Stick to your guns. Just keep telling her No. Your guest list is set and younhand picked the most important people in YOUR life.
Post # 4
@CurlyCue: Agreed. And given you are marrying this man, I think his feelings about this day are just a smidge more important than Aunt’s & Cousin’s feelings. Tell mom, “as a married couple, we will have a lifetime of difficult decisions and compromises to make, and the first comes with how we start our lives together – our wedding.”
When aunt and cuz find out its a very small, intimate affair, I think they will understand. If not, too bad.
Post # 5
- Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry
Just say no. Second cousins/great Aunts are very low on the family invite list, *especially* since you’re having such a small ceremony.
If your Mom keeps bugging, she could always host a party/family reunion a month from now.
Post # 6
@honeybee21: I think you should tell your Mother that even if you were inclined to invite your Aunt and Cousin, a last minute invitation isn’t very appealing. It screams “B List” and or “afterthought” and isn’t very flattering or charming to the persons being invited.