Post # 1
My future mother in law bought a dress that I think it way to fancy and it has way too much sparkle. I feel like she is trying to upstage me and my mom. Also, her dress is a mermaid dress, silver and heavily beaded with a scroll design and crystals with a slight train.
When she showed me the dress I pretended to be happy she found a dress but now it is keeping me up at night thinking about it. Also, my fiance was going to wear a silver tie and vest and now I feel like he’d match his mom and not me if he did.
Is it normal for the mother of the groom to have such a formal dress?
Post # 3
I think it really depends on how formal your wedding is. If your wedding is very formal, then the MOB and MOG would wear more formal gowns. I think her dress is lovely and not too over the top, but it is your wedding, so you have to decide if it is right for your celebration.
I bet she was trying to coordinate with the style of your gown so it all looked cohesive.
Could your mom get a more formal gown that is more in line with the formality of the MOG?
What does your dress look like?
I think if your FH wore a lighter shade of silver, that he would match your dress more than hers.
Post # 4
Sorry to hear you feel this way. There was a similar thread to this a little while ago.. I personally believe that you cant do much about MOG’s choice of dress. Who cares if her dress matches the groom’s tie, he’s her son… everyone still knows that you are the bride and that you are the groom’s date for day whether you match or not. If the dress really is too fancy compared to what everyone else is wearing then she will look silly and overdressed. I personally dont care what anyone else wears to my wedding, my FMIL can show up in gold sequins from head to toe.. and I wont bat an eyelid.
Post # 5
I agree that it depends on how formal your wedding is. A MOG would look appropriate in that dress at a formal evening reception, especially if the bridesmaids are wearing long dresses. If your FMIL will look much more formal and flashy than you and your mother will, perhaps she simply isn’t aware of that. You could let her know that the dress is beautiful and you’re sure she’ll look fantastic in it, but that you’re concerned that she might feel a bit overdressed since the dress is more formal than what you and your mother are wearing.
Post # 6
If it’s a formal wedding, that dress is perfect–I wish my mom would wear something like that. If it’s not formal, maybe talk to her about getting something less formal?
I don’t think it will upstage you at all.
Post # 7
Nobody will notice, trust me. Definitely not something worth losing sleep over! Everyone will be looking at you, and the MOG will be a fleeting memory. At least she will be color coordinated with the pictures!
Post # 8
If she has already purchased it, there probably isn’t much you can do. If she hasn’t, you could show her a picture of your mother’s dress and maybe show her some ideas of what would be more appropriate.
When one of my friends got married (2:30pm ceremony), her mother in law wore a bright turquoise sequined dress, with a heart-shaped cut out in the back. Clearly this was a prom dress, it was WAY to fancy for this event and pretty tacky. However, that’s what she saw herself wearing for her son’s wedding and it just wasn’t worth it to tell her otherwise. This was 18 years ago, the couple is divorced, but we still talk about it!
Post # 9
If it is too formal, people will notice its too formal and it will only reflect on her. If its not too formal, then it will be appropriate.
Either way, it wont reflect good or bad on you what she wears. I would be happy for her that she found a dress she likes and feels beautiful in. I strongly believe weddings are just as much about the parents as it is the couple. Its a day of pride for parents that their children are grown, responsible adults now and they had a part in it.