(Closed) MOG says she can wear any color she wants because she’s paying. sorry long…..

posted 6 years ago in Family
  • poll: Color coordinate a little or go a totally different color
    Coordinate : (15 votes)
    16 %
    Different color : (77 votes)
    84 %
  • Post # 3
    2095 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    My mom wore a sapphire blue and his mom wore fuschia. My colors were turquoise and sage. I wouldn;t worry too much about what they are supposed to wear. As long as they are happy in the end that is all that matters.

    Post # 4
    4194 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry

    Below is what Martha Stewart says on MOB/MOG dresses. Neither my Mom, Future Mother-In-Law, or Stepmom are coordinating with my wedding colors. The knot says similar things to Martha-I’ve always heard that they should be different than your colors, not match.


    “The MOB and MOG dress-buying rule is simple: The MOB chooses her dress first, then lets the MOG know what she’s wearing. Of course if the two women are friends, they can go shopping together with their color palette in mind (that should be determined in a conversation with the bride), or they can speak by phone about their plans. The goal isn’t to match perfectly, but rather not to clash. For example, if the MOB wears a long eggplant-hued dress, the MOB should wear an equally rich color, like jade or bronze. One more thing to remember: The dress code of the wedding — and the length of the bridesmaids dresses — should determine the length of the MOB and MOG’s dresses.”

    Post # 5
    13 posts
    • Wedding: May 2012

    I’m sorry I can’t support you on this one. The parents of the bride and groom are in my opinion just that, parents. They should be able to wear whatever they want, just like any other person at the wedding – regardless of whether or not they are paying.

    I would just encourage her to wear what she feels happy, beautiful and comfortable in. It’s impossible for everyone at the wedding to “match”; I’m sure your pictures will still look great. 

    For what it’s worth, I’ve been to 6 weddings in the past year and a half, and the mother of bride/groom has not once coordinated the colour of their attire to the wedding colours. 

    Post # 6
    1659 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    If it’s important to you that she wear a coordinating color, then you need to be firm on articulating that, but there is no rule or standard dictating that MOG or MOB need to dress in a certain color. I was in a wedding last year where the colors were poppy and yellow, and MOG wore electric coral with matching louboutins. Whatever.

    Post # 8
    5096 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    Honestly, is this really the battle you want to have?

    ETA – My bias: my mom wore black to my wedding and rocked it, and it never would have occurred to me to be bothered by it. I think the moms should wear what they feel best in.

    Post # 9
    6248 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 1900

    Aw hun, sorry you’re so upset! She was rude to say she can wear whatever she wants just because she’s paying.

    I wouldn’t try to coordinate the MOG dress with your color scheme though. ¬ She isn’t part of the bridal party.

    Post # 10
    674 posts
    Busy bee

    I just saw wedding pictures of a friend where the MOB wore lavender and the MOG wore bright red. Not once did I look at her pictures and think, “You know, that wedding was really missing something because the mothers didn’t coordinate with the wedding colors or each other.”

    I get that you might have had a vision or ideal of what you wanted, but I don’t think this is a battle worth fighting if she’s contributing to the wedding. Hell, even if she wasn’t contributing, I’d wonder if this is really an argument you want to focus on for your wedding day.

    Post # 11
    2281 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    I’m sorry you’re having to deal with this stress. 

    I would say let this one go and let her wear whatever the hell she wants, regardless of what’s traditional, if for no other reason than because you are NOT going to win an argument with someone who uses the fact that they’re paying for something as a reason to override your requests. Let it go. 

    And don’t worry about how it will look – I’m sure the pictures will turn out just fine. 

    Post # 12
    2725 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: November 2011

    I’ve seen dozens of threads on here about the MOG or MOB wearing colors the bride did not agree with. You’re not alone! I wouldn’t let it get to you. Right now it seems like a huge deal but when you get your photos back you will forget it was even an issue.

    Post # 13
    11273 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: April 2012

    my mother, Mother-In-Law and step mother wore whatever they wanted to wear.  they knew the wedding colours so they bought dresses that didn’t clash.

    Post # 14
    3689 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: December 2011

    I thought this was going to be one of those “she’s planning to wear white” threads.

    The parents are not part of the wedding party, so there’s not really any reason for them to be wearing the wedding colors.  That is, unless you want to make her part of the wedding party.  But you’d have to expressly communicate that to her.

    Post # 15
    750 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 2012

    @LibertyBelle:  Not once did I look at her pictures and think, “You know, that wedding was really missing something because the mothers didn’t coordinate with the wedding colors or each other.”


    OP, if this were my future Mother-In-Law, I’d just let her go with it. It wasn’t so long ago that all the bridesmaids were in the exact same magenta taffeta dress with identical french twists and dyed-to-match satin pumps. The hyper-coordinated wedding may have run its course.

    Post # 16
    14345 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    Sorry, I dont think the moms have to cordinate with the bridal party.  And I dont even think it really matters.. who really has the moms/dads in teh pictures with the bridal party anyways??  (unless i totally misssed that one)  You have your bridal party pictures, you have your parent pictures.. totally separate and therefore irrelavant what MOB/Gs wear.  My colors were red/purple.  MOG wore gold, and my mom wore dark eggplant… they just bought whatever they thought looked best on them.

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