(Closed) MOH Can’t Come to Wedding

posted 8 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
3257 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Unfortunately, I think that if she cannot be there, she’s not your Maid/Matron of Honor. That doesn’t mean that she’s not still your best friend and confidante!

Will she be SUPER far along when you’re getting married? My sister was six months pregnant and flew to MN from SC to be our sister’s Maid/Matron of Honor and it worked out just fine for her! If so, would it be possible to adjust your wedding date if it’s that important to you to have her there?

Post # 4
151 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Iwouldn’t say “absent”.  Do you have space for something like:

” as FH & I celebrate this milestone, Maid/Matron of Honor is celebrating a very special one of her own and is sadly unable to join us”

Just an idea x

Post # 5
402 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

mention she is absent and do not try to upgrade someone else as your bridesmaid just because she cant make it.  Dont make someone take her place leave things as they are and put something about her being absent to bring a bundle of joy into the world.

Post # 6
647 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I agree with mentioning that she’s your Maid/Matron of Honor somewhere in the program, I like the way mrsgtobee phrased it.  I definitely wouldn’t replace her.

Post # 7
5823 posts
Bee Keeper

I don’t think you need to add anything.  Put her name in the program.  If anyone asks where she is, just explain that she’s (giving birth/just had a baby/about to have a baby).  It’s not actually their business anyway, but keeping her in the program is a sweet way to tell her you’re thinking of her and wish she could be there.

Post # 8
529 posts
Busy bee

Second the mrsgtobee phrasing. I think it shows respect for your friend and acknowledges what must have been a very difficult decision for both of you to arrive at. It acknowledges your relationship.


As a point, you might want to split up traditional Maid/Matron of Honor duties among the four – one signs the certificate, one does the rehearsal toast, one does the wedding toast, one stands next to you at the altar, etc. Someone still needs to do these things – but splitting it makes it mangeable.

Good for you for being a supportive and understanding friend during this importnat time in you and your friend’s life.

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