MOH doesn't like her dress options-advice please :S

posted 3 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
931 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Ask her if she has any ideas.

Post # 4
Member
2400 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I would say “I really love the dresses and you can wear them so many different ways.” Bridesmaids are suppose to kind of wear what you want them to. My BF is looking at the same dresses for her wedding next summer too. I love them and think they can work with any body type!!

 

I don’t see how she has a choice here.

 

Post # 5
Member
2565 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

If the bride picks out a dress that is completely unflattering on a bridesmaid, I am on team bridesmaid and the bride should choose a different dress.  If the preferred dress looks good on the bridesmaid but she doesn’t like it because it is not her “personal style” I am on team bride and the bridesmaid needs to suck it up.  If everyone in your party didn’t want to wear the dress that is one thing, but if it is only her and her reason is personal preference she needs to get over it and wear the dress.

Post # 6
Member
1068 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

@brooke25:  My honest opinion about the convertible dresses is that they’re a pain in the butt.  I’m very petite, and it’s just a lot of fabric on my frame.  There are a lot of ways that you can tie them, but almost all of them are open-back.  I thought that all of the ties looked very revealing, and my mother agreed that they were almost all inappropriate for her tastes as well.  I’ll admit that my tastes are pretty conservative.

There’s one matronly short-sleeve style where you can wear a bra.  That’s how I’d wear mine if I was asked to wear the dress for a wedding.  I’m not huge chested, but it was nipples everywhere without a bra.  It wasn’t really an issue with my body type, but the fabric didn’t hide *anything*.

That said, I’m not a big believer in complaining about what brides have chosen for their bridesmaids, and I’d make it work without complaint if I needed to.  But they would not be my first choice if I was picking my own dress.

Post # 7
Member
964 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

You shouldn’t expect someone to spend a hundred+ dollars on something they don’t like, whatever the reason. 

Have her send you a few photos of things she likes or ask her what kinds of styles she likes. I’m sure you can find something you both agree on. It might be “your day” but it’s her money.

Post # 8
Member
1611 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@figgnewton:  +1 this is what I would say too… I have a convertable dress, and I love it!

Post # 9
Member
3618 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I set up a FB page for my BM’s and they came up with their own dress together! Maybe something similar would help? We all live in different areas as well and it was easiest on me to just give them a place where they could converse and choose. Also maybe you can be relaxed on the style but put your foot down on a color or vice versa? You may be surprised what your BM’s will find! 

Post # 11
Member
964 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

@MrsPaperFlowers:  Yes but people have different tastes. OP’s MOH doesn’t like them so I don’t think she should have to pay $185+ for a dress she’ll never wear.

I don’t even understand the need for bridesmaid dresses. Why can’t bridesmaids just wear pretty cocktail dresses they’ll wear again? Especially if you have tons of bms. They don’t need to look like a chorus line.

Post # 12
Member
1068 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

@MrsPaperFlowers:  Yeah, I mean there are a lot of ways to cover up, but the end result looks way less flattering than a standard dress in my opinion.  I don’t think they’re unworkable, just sub-optimal.

Post # 13
Member
1611 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@Syzygy88:  Because in a lot of places, particurlarly where I am, not having your bridesmaids somewhat match is taboo.. A lot of people didn’t like that I had mine in different colors (I didn’t care).. My maids will probably never wear their dresses again, but, they did it because they were honored to be in our wedding, just like how when I was in my sisters wedding, I spent nearly $200 w/o alterations on a dress that will hang in my closet until I give it to a daughter for dress up, or to my sister to wear, but I did, because I love the bride.. Different folks, different strokes, but, usually it’s the brides choice what the BM’s wear..

 

OP, sorry for the threadjack, I am HUGE on loving the convertible dresses, I wish I had discovered them before I picked BM dresses.

Post # 14
Member
451 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

@jdhall89:  I totally agree. I thought about these, but all the ties I saw were really quite revealing – lots of open back, cleavage, etc. And I don’t have conservative tastes! I think it would have been an even bigger issue for one of my BM who is bigger. I find they are also not very forgiving even on a fit woman. I think even with a cami or tube top (which I think would look odd with a lot of the ties), they can still be difficult to wear.

That said, none of the above answered OPs question! @brooke25 have you asked her what about it is not her style? That might give you a better idea of what her expectations are. Maybe there’s something specific that she doesn’t like. You can try David’s Bridal (depending on what city/province you’re in) or Alfred Sung – my sister’s been in 2-3 weddings where they used Alfred Sung and they always looked great (though I think run $160+). 

If you do decide on convertible dresses, henkaa.com is a good, reasoably priced (for what I’ve seen for these types of dresses), Canadian company (ETA: they are mostly online but have a retail store in TO)

Post # 15
Member
1611 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@jdhall89:  maybe I’m bias, I think mine looks really nice on me, and I have a heavier friend who wears one and it looks great on her too… again.. different folks, different strokes…

Post # 16
Member
11772 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2013

Is the the only MOH? You could always put her in a different dress?

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