- 8 years ago
- Wedding: April 2010
Hi bees! Hope everyone is having a great day!
So..we’re 12 days out! Wow..
Sorry, I have a feeling this is going to be really long. I’m kind of upset with my MOH. I don’t think I posted about this before, but here’s what’s happened. MOH and I were always really close. Like BFFs. We did stuff together, talked all the time, then her sister moved in with her. This time was a really baddd time for me, I was severely depressed and having panic attacks. It was pretty bad. During this time (I don’t know why), but MOH ignored me. FI and I would visit, and she wouldn’t even acknowledge me as a person in the room. It seemed like she didn’t care. This really upset me and went on for quite a while. It wasn’t in my head; FI and my mom noticed it too. Fast-forward to now…things gradually got a little better. It seemed when her sister moved out is when she started talking to me again (I felt like I was just a replacement for when her sister wasn’t there). So, when she started talking to me again, (instead of saying “Just forget about it”) I asked her if she was still interested in being my MOH. She said yes. She really hasn’t been involved in much of the planning. I asked her to go with me to look at the venue when I was picking it out, which was 5 minutes away, and she wouldn’t go. Really, she only began to help within the last month. I was very overwhelmed with everything, and she wanted me to send her a list of things I had left to do. I appreciated her trying to help, but it became too much (she was trying to push things I told her I didn’t want). She begged me to come over and bring all of the wedding things I had (she lives an hour away), so I loaded my car and drove out there. We talked about the wedding for maybe 15 minutes and she showed me the jewelry and shoes she bought. Then I came out 2 days later to do the same thing with really no talk of the wedding. I had to bring it up, in which we talked for 5 mintes about table layouts, and I showed her a picture of the venue. Then she played Guitar Hero. I sat at the table going through all of my lists and everything she asked me to drive out there for, while she played video games. I just thought..whatever.
Well, I was talking to her on the phone yesterday and was asking her a question that had nothing to do with the wedding. My FI was really upset about something (and with reason), so I called her about it. I was not being rude or anything, then she just called my FI an ass and hung up on me. I was boiling. I mean, really upset. I didn’t want to call her back until I collected myself, because otherwise, I would let out everything that I’ve been holding back from her. I called about an hour later, to no answer, so I left a message saying “well, we were having a conversation, and you hung up on me, so I was trying to call you back”. She never called. About 2 hours later I got a text saying “This is when the bachelor/bachelorette party is, and what we’re doing”. I’m still really upset, and don’t even want to attend. I’m really close to just saying never mind about being moh. She hasn’t really helped with the planning (even though she’s convinced people that she’s been helping all along, but I’ve been refusing her help!) There’s just been so much drama with this wedding. It seems like I’ve been trying to please everyone else, and I’ve been trying to keep everything on an even keel. I’ve spent more time crying over this wedding process, than I have enjoying it. I haven’t been a bridezilla to anyone, I even told my MOH and bridesmaid they could wear whatever dress they wanted, just in the correct colors (that turned out to be more drama). I just feel that this is supposed to be FI and I’s time to be happy and do what we want, but it seems it has very little to do with us. Can anyone offer any insight, or have had a similar experience? Sorry this is so long, I really needed to get it off my chest. Thanks for taking the time to read it 🙂