Post # 1
Advice needed please, my matron of honor has me at my wits end:
Backstory: I’ve known her since we were in 4th grade and she’s always been a bit pushy but I’ve accepted her as she is. Last year she got married and her bachlorette was a sports game, dinner and Buffalo Wild Wings and then a bar. She didn’t wanna get drunk cause she gets a little nutty but ended up getting drunk anyway. Then her wedding was a disaster.
<br />Fast forward to now:
Originally I wanted to do a booze cruise but it turned out to be too much money. She was trying to tell me that when she tried to plan it originally (before the rates went up) she said no one wanted to do it but I found out no one even responded to her. One of the other bridesmaids jumped in and is now planning my bachlorette, (harrahs in atlantic city which i’m so ok with-bikini and a pool in january!!!) because my matron of honor told her she wanted to go on a ski trip for my bachlorette- I don’t ski and i’m a clutz. Plus, I’m giving my matron of honor some leeway on her dress cause she’s trying to get prego but she hasn’t even picked one out yet, and i’m 199 days til my wedding.
AND NOW SHE’S PROBABLY MOVING TO FLORIDA-
What the hell do I do?
Post # 2
FutureMrsKeller32815: Not really sure what exactly is the problem with the bachelorette. Is it that your MOH had a different idea initially than what is being planned now?
And regarding the dress, it sounds like your wedding over 6 months away. You’re not in rush mode yet for her to find a dress. Maybe you could give her a deadline of say, 2 more months to find and order a dress, and if she can’t find something, you will just order her the same as everyone else, but in a larger size, so that it can be taken in if she isn’t preggo, or as-is if she is preg.
Post # 3
She’s upset because I didn’t like her ideas-sorry i’m venting so I may not have explained myself correctly. She doesn’t want to go to AC or anything that is more my personalitly. I’m more outgoing and like to be out and about and she’s a homebody so she’s pissed that we’re going to AC and told the other bridesmaid that if it’s not one specific weekend she’s not going *just found that out two min ago*.
She asked me why we can’t do a cooking class in NYC or just do a spa weekend, and as much as I do like that stuff, this is a weekend for me to kick back and have a good time. I kill myself working 60-80 hours a week and don’t get to really enjoy myself often.
Yes my wedding is about 6 months away. My concern is that she’s going to pick a dress different from the other girls who all ordered their dresses already because they don’t want the $$ issues during the holiday season. I already told her that i’d like to keep with a similiar style but now with her 99% sure she’s moving to flordia I’d like to see the dress she picks before she orders it cause I don’t want her to look completely different then the other girls. (I wouldn’t put it past her she’s threated to do it to another girls wedding two years ago).
Post # 4
1) As far the bachelorette party, it should be something YOU want, not what she wants. If she can’t go to AC for whatever reason, just let it go. It sounds like if she feels forced to go, she’ll be miserable company anyways.
2) As far as the dress goes, you’re still six months out, so it’s not panic time. That said, if the sole reason she’s waiting on the dress is to see if she gets pregnant, she doesn’t need lots of time. I know every person is different, but generally women don’t show until 3/4 months along. So if you’re four months out from your wedding and she still isn’t pregnant, she should just order the dress. You do get to set guidelines for the dress even if she is pregnant. (At this point, the most she’ll be is six months.) You can tell her what color and style, even if you don’t give the exact dress. Generally my thought is that if the BM doesn’t get the dress, they’re not a BM.
3) It sucks that your friend is moving to Florida. You may have to adjust your expectations in what her role is in the wedding. Would she still be able to come?
Post # 5
Apple_Blossom: I agree with all of this.
I also want to point out that January is not at all pool/bikini weathers in the North East.
Post # 6
Horror? What horror?
Bachelorette – Show some leadership and state what it is that you would like.
Dress – She is probably waiting until closer to the Wedding to best accomodate her body if she is pregnant, which she doesn’t know and this time.
Florida – Ok, so you’ll have to take a space ship to have any contact with her at all, yea, that stinks.
Post # 7
Yes she’s able to come, I think, she’s giving the bridemaid issues now with the date of the shower.
(Harrahs has an indoor pool party kinda like vegas)
My biggest problem with this whole thing is why can’t she just cooperate even the slightest? Everythings a fight with her. I didn’t even think about doing this shit to her for her wedding.