(Closed) MOH issues – need advice!

posted 5 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
72 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@MayBride13:  I hate seeing situations like this. It’s so frustrating. I might have bad advice, but I wouldn’t tell her about anything in advance, it doesn’t seem to matter. Send he invites like with everyone else, and if she responds, she responds, if not, just let it go. She is obviously not going to be there for you like she should be, she’s not playing the role of the MOH or even making an effort. Just come to the ralization that she wasn’t the right peson & you couldn’t have known in advance, but she’s who you picked. Don’t let her selfishness ruin you wedding for you & don’t try and push her, if she gets things done and shows up for things she should be there for, then GREAT!! but if not, don’t stress. I wouldn’t put anymore effort towards her friendship, if she wants it, she can come to you to hang out o do things for the wedding.

I’m having a situation with a bridesmaid. We use to be SO close!! She told me she wanted to go to all the dress fittings & bridal shows, so I invited he to every single one, only for he to cancel last minute…often the same day. Including RIGHT NOW, she’s canceling on me for the last time to try on my dress before ordering it. I don’t think it would bother me if she didn’t INSIST on going to all appointments, then bail on every single thing with lame excuses for things she should of never made plans doing when we already had plans….and I ALMOST made he MOH, thank god I didn’t. Sorry, this thread isn’t about me 🙂 But I get where you’re coming from a little bit, and in my situation…I’m done trying. I’m not inviting her anymore. I’ll mail her invites to the shower and things like that, if she shows great, if not, oh well, I’m no longer stressing on it and that’s why I give you the same advice. My wedding peparation has enough stress, I’m not letting he add more. I’m over it.

Post # 4
Member
467 posts
Helper bee

@MayBride13:  I say give her a little bit of slack.  It sounds like she is going through a rough time with the break up and is probably pretty jealous of your marriage.   (At least that’s the vibe I’m getting from your post.)  Why not have a girls weekend, just you and her, and ask her what’s going on?  Tell her how you are feeling, like she’s ignoring you.  Obviously your close to this girl.  You asked her to be your MOH.  A heart to heart may be in order.  (Make sure you do this in person.)

I have a friend who was recently pretty jealous about her twin getting married.  She’s single, and she’s pretty green about her sister’s wedding.  For people who are single and want to get married, watching close friends and family get married can be really tough.  I’m not excusing her behavoir.  Just try to be a little understanding and openly communicate with her about your feelings.   

Post # 7
Member
467 posts
Helper bee

@MayBride13:  I just wanted to mention, the jealous girl I was talking about, insists she is the happiest she’s ever been beng single.  She says its great and an opportunity to find herself, and talked about her sister’s and other frends weddngs all the time.  I suspected this is not the case by reading behind the lines, and listening to what she was actually saying.  We accidently got rip roarng drunk one night and she confessed the truth.

Take it all wth a grain of salt.  People don’t want to tell you they are jealous or unhappy.  

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