MOH issues. To keep her or stay without a MOH

posted 3 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
1721 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@eecuadrado:  When you say you’re only having a MOH because your aunt can’t handle the duties by herself…what exactly do you mean?  Are you talking about for the wedding itself or all the pre-wedding parties?  If you didn’t really want her to be in the bridal party originally and are unhappy with it, then maybe you need to talk to her.  However; if she ends up breaking up with her bf before the wedding will wish she was still in it?  One of my BM’s has a new bf and I haven’t heard from her since…unfortunately, I know whenever she gets a new bf she has a tendancy to go MIA and as annoying as it is, its not worht arguing with her about since regardless nothing will change.  But if you think talking to her or taking her out of the bridal party will save you drama on the day of your wedding than better to do it now and give her 9 months to get over it and forgive you than wait til closer to the wedding.

Post # 4
Member
1613 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

@eecuadrado:  So when she’s not with him she’s  a great friend, but she they are together she is distant?

Do you “need” a MOH? A lot of brides do not have one. All the girls collectvely can plan your shower and and bach party. Maybe even your mother can do it?

 

Post # 7
Member
3769 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 1999

I would just leave things are they are and make sure everything is taken care of so all anyone has to do is show up on the day of the wedding. They can all work together for a shower if they decide to throw one. I would tell or “demote” anyone, I also think I would quit mentioning how someone was my thrid choice, and picked just because I thought I had to have one. I am guessing those types of comments wouldn’t feel good hearing if this came back to your MOH.

I hope wedding planning/life settles for you, it seems like it has been full of drama so far.

Post # 8
Member
46 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I dont suggest having your cousin tell her! That is rude. If you don’t want to have her be MOH just tell her! Possibly just suggest that she seems a little distracted lately and your cousin has been helping you more than she has been and then ask if she would be ok with just being a bridesmaid instead! Why didn’t you ask your cousin in the first place if you really wanted her to be the MOH/you were crushed that she wasn’t your MOH like you stated?

Post # 11
Member
46 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2014

oh! she was one of the previous girls you asked. i thought you were just picking her out of no where. i still suggest you just bring it up gently telling her shes too distracted lately. Maybe by you telling her that will change her attitude about the situation and put her boyfriend on the back burner to concentrate more on the wedding?

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