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First wedding Nightmare

Mom and Sister won't let me see my dress!

posted 10 months ago in Dress
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    1.
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    Bumble bee
    MrsNerdy    April 14, 2012   Austin wedding, live in Houston, TX

    Which is driving me completely crazy!

     

    Okay so here's whats happening.  We bought my dress 10 months before the wedding, which is in April.  We decided to start at David's Bridal, and move up in price range if we didn't find anything.  Well we all 3 fell in love with a dress that has been discontinued, so we were able to buy the sample in store for over 50% off!  My dad made the suggestion that I shouldn't get to see it often, because if I see it hanging in my closet every day then by the time April rolls around, it will be old news.  I totally agree.  HOWEVER, I am trying to figure out if I want to add a bolero to the dress or if it would even work, and I can't find any picture of it at all!  My sister took pictures of me wearing the dress, but refuses to send me the pictures, and my mom has the dress in her closet but won't let me see it.  AND because it is discontinued, it is not on the DB website, and I have tried to google a description of the dress but with no luck (imagine googline "a-line ivory crystal strapless wedding dress with flowers")

     

    Anyone else longing for their dress?  Or just hoping it is not actually really ugly because you can't even remember what it looks like?

     

    (also if anyone has any suggestions where to find a picture of my dress please let me know!)

     
    2.
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    Helper bee
    Lovebird724    April 9, 2011   Jersey

    i left my dress at my mom's house on purpose after i bought it - that way i wouldnt be too tempted to put it on and dance around in it :)

    as far as finding a pic of it, do you have the style number?  my dress was discontinued shortly after i bought it, but a google image search of the style number and designer still brings it up

     
    3.
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    Sugar bee
    MsBrooklynA       Midwest

    If I were you I would go over and say that it is your dress and not theirs to hold hostage from you. This is almost as bad as the cat thread. What about when you have to have alterations done? Are they still going to want you to keep your eyes closed? How about when you want to pick our jewelry to go with your dress? This seems insane to me. I would not stand for it that is for sure.

     
    4.
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    Buzzing bee
    MapleBecky    July 9, 2011   Canada

    I would politely talk to them and remind them that any other bride planning a wedding gets to see their dress and pictures to decide on accessories.

    If I were dealing with someone treating me like I was 12, I would go out and buy myself a dress and skip them all together.

     
    5.
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    Sugar bee
    ktisthatbees    May 1, 2011   Atlanta GA/Charleston SC

    I see what your family is trying to do, and that is sweet that they want to keep the feeling of the dress being new and exciting.

    But keeping your dress hostage to the point where you can't even match accessories to it is taking things too far.

    You need to sit down with them and explain this. They don't have a right to be doing this and it's hurting your feelings, not helping.

     
    6.
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    Helper bee
    bridget.sutter    October 8, 2011   North Branch, Minnesota

    Contact Davids Bridal and have them look up your customer info.  They should have a record of what you bought.

     
    7.
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    Bumble bee
    Theresa90405    April 10, 2010   Santa Monica, CA

    That's so weird and I would be so irritated. I mean, a little dress regret is inevitable but, dude. It's your dress. You need at least a picture in order to figure out hair/makeup/jewelry/shoes/etc.

    They're being ridiculous.

     
    8.
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    Bee Keeper
    jo.lee    September 10, 2011   Indianapolis

    Yeah, I think their hearts are in the right place, but remind them you need to see it one more time to pick out accessories. Assure them it won't make the dress 'old news' if you have one more look, and if they refuse, put your foot down. Logic is definitely on your side on this one!

     
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    Busy bee
    med700    November 5, 2011   Canada

    It's almost funny, if it didn't cause me to have heart palpatations b/c all you are trying to do is determine what accessories to get with it!

    Tell your mom and sis they're being ridiculous and that this is to make the whole outfit and without being able to see the dress you'll just pick something that doesn't match.  Then your dress is ruined anyways.....

     
    10.
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    Busy bee
    cubaneli    November 5, 2011   Tampa

    i would goole images of "david's bridal discontinued dresses" and look if you see it.. good luck!!

     
    11.
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    Bumble
    Beekeeper
    Miss Tattoo    September 15, 2012   Pittsburgh, PA

    I can see what they are trying to do, but you need to see it. Maybe contact DB's to see if they have your info. They will be able to give you a style number and google image search will bring it up. Or just march over there and take the dress.

     
    12.
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    Busy bee
    amberdawn1064    October 15, 2011   PA

    Why dont you just go to your moms when she isnt there and put it on and dance around in it an put it back and keep it to yourself until after the wedding.

     
    13.
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    Bee Keeper
    2PeasinaPod       Philadelphia

    I think it's sweet that they're trying to preserve the "new" feeling of the dress, but you have to be able to match accessories and whatnot with the dress. If you don't know what it looks like, that won't be helpful. 

    Maybe pick a day that you can go see it just once again to see if a bolero would look ok...try to kill two birds with one stone and get your jewelry out of the way while you're there.

     
    14.
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    Bumble bee
    MrsNerdy    April 14, 2012   Austin wedding, live in Houston, TX

    thanks bees!! I know they aren't doing it to be mean, they just want it to be more special for me later.  I'm sure if I threw some sort of fit then they'd give it up, but I don't really like that sort of drama, and I don't want to taint the wedding planning with that vibe.

    But good idea on contacting DB. I have to go pick up my veil soon, so i will ask them then, that way I can at least google the pictures of it!  Cause really, HOW else am I supposed to pick out anything!?

     

    But I'm glad to hear I'm not the only one who finds it slightly ridiculous!  

     
    15.
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    Busy bee
    JoeBeth12    June 12, 2010  

    My turn to say I don't want to be mean, But this is one of the most ridiculous wedding-related things I've ever heard! Forget that it's fun to peak at your wedding dress, yeah, like several times a day if it's at your place and that you only have a few hours to wear it and the lead-up to having it on is so very special -- it's also (almost) crucial to be able to look at it, how it sparkles in different light, the features, and so forth -- to be able to accessorize, consider your hairstyle, yes, even make-up.... all of it... including bridesmaids' style, adornment at the wedding itself.  Your dress is the center of attraction (well, as are you.. and your man) and you should be able to contemplate it and study and enjoy it as much as you please.  I'd step up and tell my family so if I were you and not waste a minute more without the joy of this once-in-a-lifetime event!

     
    16.
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    Honey bee
    Zinzerena    April 14, 2012   Virginia

    @MrsNerdy: Ummmm... I agree with the others.  Talk to them, explain that it is important to see the gown (not necessarily put it on) so you can buy the right accessories.  

    If it helps, my gown is hanging on the door of our closet and I haven't peeked at it for a couple months.  (Though...that might change tonight!)  

    My evening gown I just bought that needs altering... well, that's a whole nother story.  I'm a bit obsessed with the fabric, and color, and the design.... it's also in a clear garment bag, lol.

     

    Go over, get the gown, examine it, take photos WITH YOUR OWN CAMERA!!!! and then bag it up and put it back where it was. :)

     
    17.
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    Helper bee
    cyrgycyrg    August 12, 2011   Canada

    oh man I'd be so pissed!! lol. I put mine on every 2 weeks or so and I love it more every time! I want to see how comfortable it is while sitting, how does the veil look with it etc. Its one thing to not have the groom see it but its your dress and you should be able to look at it and try it one as much as you like!!! Trust me if you love your dress the novelty will not wear off...

     
    18.
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    Busy bee
    vmblai1019    October 29, 2011   Atlanta, GA

    @MrsNerdy: If you had written down the style number, you could have googled around to see what images come up. That would have narrowed the search quite a bit. Good luck!

     

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