Post # 1
This has been bugging me for ages. I thought we had our bridal party picked and then there was drama, and FH has de-sashed a groomsman, and chosen two more! uh, ok. So i have a dilemma. I am very close with two girls, i am in south florida, one is in chicago (where the wedding is) and one in north carolina. They are my bridal party. I did it that way, so i wouldnt have to say, you’re the MOH and you’re just a BM (not that either would care, they are just excited to be involved!) But, now that im faced with a third bridal attendant, the only person i can think that i’d really WANT up there with me is my mom. She is really and truly my best friend. She’s the person i ask for advice, the one i cry to and break down with, the wine bottle sharer and sounding board. She really is my rock (well, her and FH!). I know there are some brides here having Mama stand up with them. Do they feel out of place? Im sad because my poor step dad will have to sit alone for the ceremony with my dad and step mom, but i dont think he’d mind. My brother is standing up for my FH, and while i probably SHOULD include his sister, she and I just ARENT close at all. ETA: FH Does NOT want his sister in the bridal party. See comment below for explanation. I could ask my cousin, but i just keep coming back to having my mom. Suggestions? Cute ways to ask her? Thanks ladies!!!!
Post # 3
Since you asked for opinions, I think it is weird when mom’s are BMs or MOHs – they are already in the bridal party as "the mother of the bride." They have a very special and unique role. To be fair, I also think it is weird when groom’s have their dad as a GM or Best Man. Weird may be the wrong word… inappropriate? And I don’t just think it is "weird" for the bride and groom to ask them to take these roles, I think the parents are being weird for accepting. AND if you brother is a GM, his sister should be a BM. Weddings are about family, and it would be a good way to start your new family by including the sister.
Post # 4
TOTALLY ask your mom to be your MOH. Guys ask their dads to be Best Man all the time. Don’t add a person just to be a filler in a bridesmaids dress. If your mom is the closest, it’s entirely appropriate.
The ceremony isn’t that long, so your stepdad shouldn’t mind too much. The sentiment of having your mom stand up for you should outweigh that.
Only thing to consider is to then make sure that your mom sits w/ her husband at the reception, whether it’s at the head table or whether you decide to mix the bridal party into different tables. Good luck!
Post # 5
I think you should include your FSIL instead of your mom. It’s weird when parents are in the bridal party-with the exception of in some Southern circles where its customary for the father to stand up as best man. I’m not really close with my FSIL, but she’s in my bridal party because she’ll be family then. Also, do you think your mom would be willing to wear a bridesmaid-type dress? Would her dress blend with the rest of the bridal party?
Post # 6
I should have mentioned that FH was very adamant that his sister NOT be in the bridal party (they have issues constantly, and she’s one of those that if she doesnt get her way will just not show up last minute with no notice)
My girls are wearing black tea length dresses of their choosing, so i’m sure mom wouldnt have a problem with that 🙂 But its a very good point to bring up!
Post # 7
My mom is my MOH and we’re having a wonderful time of it!!!! I totally dissagree that it is inappropraite, that’s just my opinion. My mom is the only girlfriend that I’ve had all my life. Other friends have come in and out of my life. I can’t think of anyone else I’d rather have up there. I did take her dress shopping and make sure she was comfortable in the dress. I knew my other BM would look great in anything so I pretty much let my mom make the decision.
The other option would be to have your brother be your "man of honor" or "bride’s man" to even out the numbers. It’s becoming more and more popular.
I certainly wouldn’t encourage you to include his sister. If they are close and he wants her to stand with him then she can be a groomswoman. I’m of the opinion that it is an honor to stand with someone as they commit their life to another and should not be taken lightly. I find it similar to giving birth. I wouldn’t want just anyone in the delivery room with me, only those who are closest and I feel support me fully. Again, it’s just my opinion though.
Let me know if you want any more specific information on how we’re making the MOH/MOB thing work! Good luck!!!
Post # 8
I have the same relationship with my mom and I’ve been telling her since I was like 14 that she was going to be my maitron of honor. Like bonniebelle101 said she’s the only girlfriend that’s been through it all with me 🙂 She really is my bestest bff – and it’s that who your MOH should be??
Go for it!!
Post # 9
I am not sure why anyone would think it is strange and weird, but, to each his own! Anyway, my FSIL had her mother as her MOH. and no one questioned it. Also, keep in mind that it does not have to be even on each side! I have 3 ladies and 2 guys.
Post # 10
go with what floats your boat.
IMHO the side do not need to be even. but i’m biased. i currently have 6 bms and FI has 1gm. lol…..