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So a little background - my mom has a scar from open heart surgery and a few from having various cancerous moles removed, so it's been difficult to find a dress that will cover up these areas. She's totally not into the matronly looking traditional MOB outfits and would like to wear a more fashionable dress. We've looked and looked but so many dresses are either classy but low cut or a little to "young" for her. So she's found one she likes that would work to cover up the areas she wants, but it's black. It's not completely black - it's black floor length empire waist and the neck is made out of strands of fake pearls. It is pretty and would be flattering on her, and honestly I don't give a s**t what she wears, but I feel like people are going to be like WTF why is the MOB in black? Does she not support the marriage? That kind of stuff.
Thoughts?
I personally have no issue with moms wearing black. Especially if it's a "fashionable" dress and not something you would wear to a funeral. I wear black to weddings 99.9999999% of the time and I don't think it's that different for moms.
meh, who can argue with a LBD? As long as it's not something crazy, you'll be ok : )
blackdress.jpg (15.9 KB, 31 downloads) 2 years old
Oh, duh, this is the dress in question:
http://www.neimanmarcus.com/store/catalog/prod.jhtml?itemId=prod99160120&ecid=NMECITEM2FRIEND
@Melissa - LOL that's amazing. I might send that to her.
I wouldn't care!
They will be able to see your mom's joy on your wedding day and if people are really reading into her dress colour they have other problems and you shouldn't care what they think!
I think that your mom should wear whatever she is most comfortable in as that is what will make her look the most beautiful. And she will be exuding joy on that day and no one will think anything about the colour of her dress!
I say go for it, and I'm one of the board curmudgeons :-P
Could she get a colored wrap/pashmina so that it's not like "and the mother wore black"?
i love that! plus it'd work with any kind of shawl or jacket (or nothing!) - depending on her tastes.
My mom is wearing black because she hates color, lol. Her entire wardrobe consists of black, brown, white, beige...neutral colors. I don't think anyone will blink an eye if your mom wears black. And if they do, eff 'em.
I really like the dress, too. But why is the model posing that way?? So strange!
Here is what my mom is wearing (it's a Wtoo bridesmaid dress.)
wtoo414.JPG (10.2 KB, 28 downloads) 2 years old
@worcester - the pashmina thing is a good way to incorporate a little color. the wedding is outside in august, though, so it may get a little toasty.
Here's a related question - what's the deal with flowers for the MOB and MOG? do people do that? i'm against any sort of prom corsage situation.
I think black dress is totally fine. Plus as long as your mom is clearly happy and enjoying the day, I don't think anyone could possibly comment on any kind of "funeral vibe" coming from your mom.
I personally wouldn't even think to notice something like that at all.
I told my FMIL to wear a LBD so I see no problem with it. As long as you mom is happy and comfortable that's what matters, you don't want her uncomfortable since that could translate into some not so pretty photos. Some people may notice that she's wearing black but that's no longer as tabo as it used to be and not as bad as wearing white. Besides, who cares what everyone else thinks?
Ahaha I like that the overwhelming consensus here is that it's fine for the MOB to wear black and nobody would think anything of it and then I email my FI and he goes "She wants to wear black? Like the color people wear at funerals?"
Sigh.
both my Mom and lambster's mom wore black! along with all my bridesmaids :)
i think your mom will look great in that dress! go for it if you like it!
Pretty sure my mom is wearing black. Ha, I actually told her to wear either black or gray. Go for it.
OMG! Your mom can rock that dress? I'm jealous. If she feels good in it, that's all that matters. Keep in mind that she could a) wear a pretty/silky pashmina around her arms to jazz it up or b) have a corsage or carry a posey that distinguishes her. Some people may still say "why was the MOB wearing black?" but you shouldn't care what they think anyway. It's your wedding and you want your mom to be comfortable.
At my brother's wedding, the MOB wore black and she looked stunning. No one said a word about her wearing black either. That dress is beautiful, and if your mom feels good in it, then that is what is most important.
And your FI... *eye roll* men! What do they know? ;)
I'm pretty sure every wedding i've been to, the MOB or MOG has worn black.
It's just an elegant, chic color.
As long as you are on good terms with your mom (IE no obvious loathing seething hatred your whole family si aware of) then nobody will think twice.
Black is TRES classy
@EAQ. I LOVE your mom's dress! it looks gorgeous! Flowy skirt...me like
@Kittyachi re: corsage. Ask your mom what she wants to do. My mom and FMIL both want wrist corsages because they don't want anything pinned to their dresses. I'm sure they don't end up being prom-y (but that was my first thought too LoL)
They can also carry a little bouquet. That's what one of my g-mas is doing.
My Mom wore black. But we had a fairly formal, evening wedding in the fall and our colors were black and white. I think it was perfectly appropriate! She looked great and got a lot of fab compliments.
Frankly, I am thrilled that she wore black and not some weird color or something frumpy and too MOB "weddingy" 
My MIL wore a LBD to our formal wedding. I had no problem with it what so ever and she looked great! That being said, there were some older guests that we basically appaled that the MOG wore black. I think it bothered MIL that others frowned on it.
I love your mom's choice for the dress! I think the pearls dress it up and looks great! I would look into getting a silk wrap that matches your wedding colors, since it's silk it will be light and airy.
Meh. The wedding colors are blueish/tealish and oranges and I'm not a fan of either of those colors with black. Black and blue is a bruise and black and orange is halloween.
Perfectly fine. Both my Mom and MIL were partially in black. I just wanted them to be comfortable. I was dead set against the corsage thing too. We ended up having small bouquets make for each of them in their favorite flowers that we presented to them during the ceremony. Then I had small vases at their tables for them to sit in at the reception so they didn't feel like they had to carry them around. It worked out great.
Personally, at first it seems like i would care if me & my mom were close...but me & my mom aren't close at all so I don't care if she wears black. But, in your case too...since your mom can't find anything else that fits her right, I can totally understand that. I say go for it..it's your wedding, people who ask that question will get over it!
I think she will look very classy and elegant in black. I wouldnt sweat it!
My mom might wear black...My bridesmaids are wearing black..it is one of my wedding colors so I am cool with it.
My mom wore black. She looked great!
Walasinski-154.jpg (125.9 KB, 28 downloads) 2 years old
Well, I mean, DUH - if black is one of your wedding colors of course it would work.
I've pretty much decided I don't care what she wears or what FMIL wears either. If people think she looks like she's at a funeral then they can leave and not eat the delicious food or drink the free booze she's giving them 
I think the rules have changed. My Mom wore red to my Dad's funeral because that was his favorite color on her. She is planning on wearing black to my wedding because she found a dress that is gorgeous on her that is black. I just want her to be beautiful on my wedding day.
Black being taboo for a wedding is a really out of date thing. No one is going to think she doesnt support you when A - shes there and B - shes smiling and hugging and beaming like a hppy proud MOB! She should wear what she feels comfortable and beautiful in and to hell with anyone elses snooty stuck in the mud opinions! (just my opinion)
You can't go wrong with black. She should wear it if thats what she likes.
That dress she wants to wear looks like a cute, fun, party dress! I don't think it would look like your mom is mourning or anything. SHe should go for it!
I think as long as she's not wearing a black veil too, it's aok (I remember reading somewhere on the Bee that one FMIL did that at the wedding - I would DIE!). We looked at LBDs for my mom, but didn't get one because she doesn't like how she looks in black. It's a little harsh on her skin tone.
But yeah, black is okay now.
i think it's classy. if you like it, she likes, EFF what the guests thinks!!
Wow - I'm totally jealous of all the awesome dresses all your moms can rock. My mom's 71 - there's no strapless/sleveless/spaghetti strap anything involved. LOL
Personally I did ask my mom not to wear black but ONLY beacause she wore black for my brother's wedding. No one really knew, but she kinda hated my (now ex) SIL and secretly she wore black out of protest (only my Aunt and I knew). So I've asked her not to wear black for mine. Plus, I don't feed the drama.
@ Kittyachi- Dude, that's a happenin' dress. I'd be thrilled if my mom could pull it off! And an added bonus: she doesn't have to look for jewelry either! :)
My mom is wearing black. Honestly I would prefer that she wear black because I hate color.
I think a respectful black would be fine. So long as it doesn't look like funeral-wear or such. I don't think the dress in question has that problem at all.
My mom, ... she has issues, so when it comes to be my time, I'm really going to have to fight with her over it.
She likes to show up to events (weddings, funerals), in just about any old thing (sneakers, sweats), and cover it up with an appropriately colored coat.
This will NOT be happening at my wedding, tyvm.
I don't think it will be viewed like that in the least!! Plus, if she feels good in the dress- she'll likely be beaming - and, that's what people will notice most!
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