Momzilla? Long post.

posted 3 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
Member
2302 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

you need to make it very clear that you love her and respect her opinion and that’s why you wanted to tell her first etc. it’s really important that she understands that even though you’re forging a new relationship with your future mother in law, she’ll always be your mom and that you don’t want her to feel excluded!

sometimes you have to put wedding planning on pause and take care of the family part first. i feel for you! i’ve had to do a little of the same with my mum – don’t worry! people just need to be reminded from time to time how special they are to you. i’m sure she’s lashing out because she’s sad, and not dealing with it well. it would be great if she dealt with it better, but she didn’t – that’s life! so hopefully after some reassurance from you she’ll feel better and refocus. 

Post # 3
Member
4 posts
Wannabee

My mom got that way. I finally told her at one point that having her tell me that she hated every idea my fiancé and I had made me feel like she wasn’t valuing our opinion.

Her response to that was to tell me that we were on our own, she retracted all previous offers to help with planning, and said she’d wait to get her invitation in the mail and see us at the wedding.

My fiance’s reaction was to say fine, that’s what she gets then. I still needed addresses for invitations from her. So I pulled out the big guns … I got in touch with my dad, and within 24 hrs had an apology email from her and she’s beenmuch easier since.

In the long and short of it, my suggestion would be to find a mediator. As much as I would have loved to just go with her idea as it would have been so easy, my mother was shut out of my siblings’ weddings completely. My fiancé and I both have insane work schedules, so we made our own agreement as to how much we’ll let my mother ‘decide’ before we step in. 

 

Post # 5
Member
2 posts
Wannabee

I’m having a similar problem… Only with my Fiance’s Mother! Only she thinks I’m choosing my family because MY family is poor and her’s isn’t. Talk about lmfao<br /><br />I’m glad your sister is helping by being the bridge. Can you reply and update us on your mother? I really do hope she’s appart of your wedding because that’s mostly what mom’s dream of -Helping thier Daughters with important life changing events. 🙂

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