Post # 1
My fiance has said in the past that he would like to do a money dance at our wedding in May. A couple of his friends were married recently and did it and while they said they made some good cash for their honeymoons, I thought it was really awkward and a bit tacky. I might not want to dance with a bunch of other men at our wedding (besides my relatives) and I feel like they are paying enough to travel (abour 2 hours for most, farther for some) and stay in a hotel and give us a gift. What do you think? Tacky tradition, or smart way to make honeymoon cash?
Post # 3
I know my parents did this back in the 70’s. I guess they would give some money, get a shot of whiskey and dance with the bride for however long. I think it’s kind of awkward and weird now, and a bit tacky. Like you said, they are paying ot travel, and stay in a hotel and give you a gift… I guess it’s sort of the same way I feel about cash bars.
Post # 4
Unless this is a cultural and usual at weddings you attend I would not do it. Personally I’ve never seen this happen at a wedding .
Post # 5
There was a pretty serious debate about the money dance a few months back- the whole "it’s tacky" vs. "it’s tradition" and there have been numerous posts.
If it’s a traditional in your family I say go for it. The first time I saw one was at the wedding of a college friend and I joined right in- dancing with both the bride and the groom. It was really funny when all their friends and relatives were pinning money on them (in their hair, on the veil, a bow tie made out of a dollar bill, etc).
A lot of people say it’s extorting money out of your guests- as a guest that had never seen one before, that was not at all my impression. It was a big laugh and all the guests were lining up to make a spectacle of the bride and groom.
I’ve heard it done in another way where the bridal party try to rally the crowd and collect money. I’ve never seen it done, so I can’t say whether it makes guests feel pressured. I can imagine it going either way- reluctant guests feeling put on the spot to give or guests seeing it as a typical part of the wedding and giving some of their cash as part of a wedding gift and enjoying a moment with the bride and/or groom.
I say do what you think is best. You know your guests better than we do!
Post # 6
- Wedding: August 2009 - St. Thomas of Villanova Church & the F.U.E.L. House
I doubt most of our guests would know what to do in this situation. But, more importantly, it doesn’t fit the feel of our wedding — and I think it would be hopelessly awkward! No go on the money dance.
Post # 7
I said yes on the money dance…shoot we make almost 2K from it and not everyone even danced. It’s funny, makes for good pictures, and if you have the time in your day you should do it. But, it depends on if it’s something that’s been done before with the crowd that will be at your wedding. It’s normal at all my family weddings, but if no one had ever done it, I wouldn’t have either just so I wouldn’t scare off the guests or anything.
Post # 8
I had never heard of this being done until last year. We were at my FI’s friends’ wedding and I was horribly appalled. Apparently it’s big in the mid-west, and they think it’s fun and no big deal. I definitely think it is based heavily on tradition.
Post # 9
I’ve had friends do it and make tons of money, it’s just not me and I will not be doing it. They’d probably pay me to stop dancing, anyway.
Post # 10
We are thinking of doing it, but not at all for the money reason. it’s just a fun thing my family has done, and most people know what to do. I wouldn’t care if people gave us pennies…it’s just fun to dance with all of our guests in that setting…and to see who gets a longer line of dancers (me or fi!….my vote is on me, but only because we’re getting married in my hometown)
It really depends on your guests and what they’re used to. It can go either way.
Post # 11
If its normal in your circles, and you guys want to do it, do it. But if you have a lot of people who have never seen one before, be prepared to have a lot of shocked guests. I have personally never seen this before, and the whole idea of trying to "make money" off you guests IS a bit appalling to me (again, it is not a tradition I identify with).
Post # 12
i don’t think it’s tacky OR smart, per say. it’s the cultural norm where i am from. we did it. no one thought it was weird or unusual because everyone does it.
Post # 13
Post # 14
I don’t think I’ve ever been to a wedding that didn’t do this before. Everyone I know has done this, and it never crossed my mind that it would be considered weird. I’ve never heard it called the "money dance" though. We call it the "dollar dance"…. not that those are severely different. Seems more demanding when you say money for some reason.
I was the moh at my sister’s wedding so I collected the money and it was great being up there watching. It gave my sister a chance to say hello and thank you to some of the people she hadn’t gotten to talk to yet (she has a guest list of over 800 people so it was hard for her to mingle with everyone). Plus it was so fun to see the girls dance with my sis and the guys dance with my brother in law. I had my camera up there so I took tons and tons of amazing candids. Plus the videographer got most of it on video.
I will def. be doing the dance. It is so fun! I understand not doing it if you have never seen or heard of it and you expect your guests haven’t either. But I think it’s worth my dollar. There have been several weddings where i didn’t think to bring money so I had to run around to beg a dollar or two off of friends so I would get a chance to join in the fun.
Post # 15
Having lived all over the country I would say it is a "regional" traditional, I have seen it done at weddings but where I am now (MA) I have never seen it done nor in my home country. If it is something that is done at weddings in your area or within your family or friends, then if you are comfortable with it by all means go for it.
If it is a matter of you not wanting to look "money-grubbing", perhaps you could do it (if it is a tradition as noted above) and donate the money to a charity or cause that is special to you & your FI.
Post # 16
I’ve only seen it done once and it was really fun. I don’t feel comforable asking for money, but they only did a dollar for theirs. I didn’t find it offensive. The couple was on a budget and it helped the happy couple on their honeymoon.
I do not plan on doing it, but if it is common in your area, go for it!