Post # 1
- Wedding: October 2014 - The Loft Reception Center
My fiance and I are just starting to begin to plan a wedding. I am planning on paying for the bulk of the wedding with some money I have saved up. I am a student and work only a few hours a week, but have a pretty good scholarship.
My fiance works a full time job, is on salery, and makes quite a bit more than me. He spends most of his time on the road so has almost no living expenses, but does have some student loans.
We are long distance and don’t get a lot of time together so I was planning a trip to stay overnight in a nice place near our hometown. When I told him about the trip though he freaked out saying he didn’t want to pay for anything like that right now.
We haven’t seen each other for 3 months and I’ve offered to pay so why is this one time expense for a trip we both really need so hard for him to get excited about? We’ve both been stressed about wedding stuff and family and could use the time away. I just want to do something special for us.
Post # 3
It sounds like you need to sit down and have a good discussion about finances. It might just be that it’s not something he feels like is good value, or he may have some financial issues you’re unaware of.
Post # 4
@bridegirl007: “why is this one time expense for a trip we both really need so hard for him to get excited about?”
Don’t ask us, ask him. Could be any number of reasons, but we can only speculate.
Post # 5
I would definitely ask him! That’s pretty bizarre. Does he want to stay someplace cheaper?
Post # 6
You could ask, “I noticed you seemed to freak out about a tentative trip. Tell me why that made you so anxious?”
He is probably not looking at it as a “we need this trip together” but more like “oh shit, weddings are expensive!” That is my arm chair guess.
Then hopefully you can open up a discussion about money, how to pay for a wedding, what you each could bring to the table, and MORE IMPORTANTLY – how you two are going to handle your finances after you’re married! Have that talk now. Try not to get caught in details like stress over one trip – you need to really hash out/come up with an arrangment for future money.