(Closed) mortified, need gift giving help!

posted 10 years ago in Gifts and Registries
Post # 3
Member
194 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2008

I think, etiquette wise, you are supposed to have a year to send a gift.

Post # 4
Member
33 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: December 2007

I wouldn’t worry about it at all! I’d send it with a card that said sorry for being so lame, but we each thought the other had sent it. For reference, we got married in December and got something last month. It’s still fun to get a gift so better late than never!

Post # 5
Member
6 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: August 2009

If it were me, I would just send a note along with the gift telling them exactly what you’ve told us here.  Yeah, I’d feel pretty embarrased too, but as it sounds to me like you’re being pretty honest.  (Really, who could make anything like that up?)

If they’re your friends, they’re understand and let it go.  They’ve probably make a mistake or two too.

Post # 6
Member
388 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2018

Knudsonwedding is right, I believe most wedding sites & mags say you have up to a year after a wedding to send a gift. 

I also agree that you can just include a note shortly explaining the confusion, no elaborate explanation needed.  Maybe reiterate what a great time you had, and what a wonderful job they did.

And I definitely don’t think you need to add a gift certificate or anything.  I think the gift and the sincere sentiment would be enough. 

Post # 8
Member
48 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2009

Sending it with a card would be fine.  Chances are, since you bought it off of their registry, they are aware that the item was purchased for them.  I bet they’ll be really excited to get a gift a few months after their wedding.

Post # 9
Member
179 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2008

I have had the same issue – didn’t take gift since it was destination and didn’t mail for about 6 months (mostly because I couldn’t drag an address our of FI).  Kicker of the story is that about a week after we finally mailed off the gift – we found out they were getting separated (now divorced).  Sooo – not that I wanted to keep it – but I’m sure it was awkward for them to receive a present around that time.

 

 

Post # 11
Member
202 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

oh i think it will be great for them to get such a lovely surprise in the mail after all of this time. they sound like gracious friends who did the right thing (not mention the gift). sent it right away with a quick note and hopefully you all will laugh about it later over drinks. 🙂

Post # 12
Member
24 posts
Newbee

I say send with a card. I am sure evrything will be fine.

Post # 13
Member
25 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: August 2008

I agree with the others that it’s fine to still send it now, with a note apologizing for the delay (and your explanation is perfectly acceptable). Only a greedy, uncaring "friend" would be upset about it.

However I do want to point out that, according to Emily Post you DO NOT have a year after the wedding to send a gift — and waiting that long is actually considered very tacky. (I read one thing that suggested it was a relatively "recent" "tradition" started so that the gift-giver could be sure the bride and groom actually made it through the first year of marriage!

Quoted from Emily Post’s Wedding Etiquette:

"Gifts should be delivered as close to the wedding date as possible, but circumstances such as an invitee’s illness may cause a delay, and couples shouldn’t question a late arrival. Some guests think they have up to a year after the wedding to send gifts; not the case (although "it’s never too late," one year is neither correct nor the norm)."

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