Mostly no kids– how to figure this out?

posted 3 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Hostess
8680 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

I’m sort of in the same situation as you.

We don’t really want kids there, simply because we’d like the adults to have a great night without the kids.

However.. there will be 2 kids invited.. one will be my flowergirl, and the other is my younger cousin whom I see ALL the time.

I’m basically going to find a job for him to do [maybe ring security? or usher?], so hopefully nobody puts up any flack about inviting him.

Do you have any small jobs you can have your friends kids do? Like a here comes the bride sign.. ushers.., ect?

Post # 4
Hostess
15072 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

I had a similar situation. I had a couple from Sweden and the couple they were staying with who were invited plus a cousin who was able to make it because it was during a move for them from Alaska to Texas. We didn’t want kids but allowed 6 for those situations. No one mentioned or even commented on it what-so-ever. Just invite those limited kids and don’t think anything about it. Doubt anyone will even notice. 

Post # 5
Member
610 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

Honestly, I wouldn’t worry about it in your case. Wedding party kids are expected to be in attendence, so nobody should give you any problems on that front, and your friends are coming from Japan. Clearly leaving the kids would not be as easy. If anybody has a hard time with it, they need to check their additudes because that’s a really special situation. 

Now, the question I do have is, do either of you have other neices and nephews who will not be in attendance? I’m a firm believer in the tier rule, meaning that all people of a certain relation should be included if any of them are.

Post # 7
Member
1433 posts
Bumble bee

@Creiddylad:  I had no kids except my flower girl. I feel like it is a really good exception if they are in the family.  As far as the other two kids, so they probably won’t stand out like a 2 year old running around so many guests might to even think twice about it. But honestly it is your wedding and its your rules. Having no other kids at my wedding is something we enjoyed very much and we didn’t get any grief from anyone!

 

Post # 8
Member
576 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

Are you sure the couple from Japan wants to bring their children? That’s two extra flights to pay for, so maybe they won’t want to?

Post # 9
Member
6048 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: March 2012

Well the twins are easy, just say we’re having them because they are in the wedding.  The other two… maybe they could hand out programs so they too will “be in the wedding”? 

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