Mother in law dress issues

posted 3 years ago in Dress
Post # 3
Member
5207 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2013

@RoseRose:  You have to ask yourself this: do you really think anyone is going to mistake her for the bride? Conventionally no, wearing white (or off white) is not something people do, but if she loves the dress that much and it’ll make her happy to wear it what harm could it do? You have to choose your battles, especially with MILs!

Post # 4
Member
3210 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

Honestly, if it were me, I’d just let it go. She’s the one who’s going to look like a nutball showing up in a wedding dress to her son’s wedding. It won’t reflect badly on you, so I’d just ignore it and let her do what she wants.

But I understand not everyone feels the same way. Heck, my mom is still bitter over the dress my dad’s mom wore to their wedding in the 80s, and they’ve been divorced 25 years!

Post # 5
Member
124 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

I agree with howsweetitis… She will be the one looking like a crazy, and all the focus will still be on you. You’re the bride and nothing can change or take away from that.

Post # 6
Member
3223 posts
Sugar bee

I do think it is batshit insane of her. 

But she is the one that is going to look the fool.  Honestly, as a guest I would love it.  I love inappropriately dressed guests.  I actually like to take pictures of them because they crack me up.

I would have FI talk to her and tell her that she is nuts (but nicer then that), and tell her that other people are going to make fun of her.

Let her wear the other ivory dress, at least it isn’t a wedding dress.

Post # 7
Member
975 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2014 - Banff, Alberta

That’s crazy. I can’t imagine she would seriously buy a wedding dress to wear to the wedding. Even if she won’t be confused for the bride because of the color it is still a freaking wedding dress. 

Post # 8
Member
1793 posts
Buzzing bee

As a 4 time MOB I have to ask – do you guys get along?  Is she one of those people where all eyes have to be on her?  OR..is she just clueless?

Post # 9
Member
89 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

What? She wants to wear a wedding dress to her son’s wedding? That’s ridiculous.

Either she is completely clueless that it’s inappropriate and maybe someone should let her know or she does know but doesn’t care and will just look ridiculous. 

I would be pretty annoyed if I were in your shoes. 

Post # 11
Member
2782 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@RoseRose:  First off- who cares if the dress she buys is a “wedding” dress- as long as it’s not white/ivory.  My cousin wore a champagne wedding dress to prom her senior year because she fell in love with it.  No one is going to wonder who’s wedding they are at.

 

Secondly- I’m likely more laid-back that other peopled– but I just don’t know it would bother me even if she wore an ivory/champagne dress.  Again- no one is going to wonder who the bride is.  

 

Assuming you guys have a good relationship, she likely just wants to wear something she’ll feel good in.  If you do not have a good relationsbip, I guess I’d be questioning her choices.

Again- I know I tend to be more on the laid back side of this- but I also happen to be someone to who doesn’t like to be the center of attention….so yeah.

 

Thankfully, my FMIL bought a dress when I was with her, and she came to be to get it OKed which I thought was funny- because I honestly didn’t really care what she wore.  But that made it easy!

Post # 12
Member
2061 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@RoseRose:  I am not one of those “let it go” girls….anyone else, no matter who, wearing anything resembling a white of any shade, is unacceptable! I would tell my FI, and have him handle it, if you don’t want to seem bitchy.  Otherwise, I would definitely bring it up and let her know that you’re not comfortable with anyone else in such a light color. Maybe even suggest that your mom is wearing a certain color, and if she wore _____, it would look good together in pictures. Of course no one will think she’s the bride, it’s the point… my own FMIL has asked about dresses and I literally said “As long as I’m the only bitch in a shade of white, we’re good..” She needs to be put in line…Now. Good luck!

Post # 13
Member
3016 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2014 - Prague

Ugh, another crazy person!!! Who wears white to someone else’s wedding? And who buys a wedding dress!!!?

Sorry you’re going through that. I would definitely have your FI speak to her. 

That being said, if her champagne dress is very white-looking, she’s just going to look like a loser. If she wears and actual wedding dress? She’s going to look totally ridiculous.

I’m shaking my head, though. People are nuts!

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