Mother in law invited to bachelorette party?

posted 3 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
851 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013 - The front lawn of our church

@dessilove:  I don’t really have any advice on this but FWIW, I somewhat feel your pain… My MIL was determined that she was going to host my bachelorette party for me!!! Thankfully I was able to turn it into a bridal shower!

Post # 4
Member
1343 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@dessilove:  Eeeesh, why does she want to come? Is she a particularly party loving type of person? 

 

Post # 5
Member
2642 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

That is awkward!  What I suggest is maybe doing something with ALL of the close women in your family beforehand (moms, aunts, grandmas) and then break off with your girlfriends later in the evening.  For my bachelorette, I had dinner with my aunts, grandmothers, god mother, mom, FMIL, and my BMs.  Then after dinner, my BMs and I hit the bars and met up with other friends.  So maybe you could do something like that.

Post # 6
Member
42546 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@dessilove:  Tell her you have consulted with your friends and none of them had their Mom or FMILat the bachelorette.

It’s unfortunate you have to deal with this. She should know better- both that she should not invite herself to anything, and that the bachelorette is for the bride and her friends, not the previous generation.

Post # 7
Member
1931 posts
Buzzing bee

That’s seriously awkward. My MIL is quite, well, prude, and it would be mortifying if she were there. 

Post # 8
Member
2562 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

Sorry, MIL – I just want to do this with my friends. Can I make it up to you somehow? Maybe we can go out for drinks or go dancing?


I think having the rain-check will help with her hurt feelings.
Though it’s cute she wants to go!
My friend’s mom came to her bachelorette, and we had a blast!

Post # 9
Member
105 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@dessilove:  When my best friend got married and had her bachlorette party all the women were involved in a pre-party.  Ate, gifts, cocktails… and then only a select few of us went out to the bar.  NO moms of any sort!

 

Post # 10
Member
108 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@dessilove:  I had this EXACT issue. My MIL was seriously hurt that she wasn’t invited. I just explained that it wasn’t fair that she come if my mom wasn’t either. I then suggested a local “bachelorette ” wine tour that included family. Hopefully this is an idea you can use as well?

Post # 12
Member
1249 posts
Bumble bee

as a frequent bridal party member, i told the bride to throw me under the bus as many times as she needed! I would tell her your BM’s are planning the party and they said friends only! I took plenty of blame for things the bride had control over & i was A-OK with it! lol

Post # 13
Member
975 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2014 - Banff, Alberta

Weeeeeeird! Why would she want to come?!

Post # 14
Member
108 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@dessilove:  I mean plan a local “family bachelorette” party in addition to the ones with your girls. 

Post # 15
Member
8593 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

Just tell her your friends are planning and they want it girls-only, no mothers.  Your own mother isn’t even coming (right?).

I don’t think it’s necessarily weird if mothers want to go to this type of thing but it depends on the mother and bride in particular.  No one should be feeling uncomfortable!

Post # 16
Member
3598 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

Does she actually understand what bachelorette parties are like?  Because I can’t understand why she would ever think she should be included in that.  

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