Post # 1
Hello All!! When me and my Fiance first got engaged, we decided to have the wedding on some family members property. Since then, Fiance family have let us know that they do not support our wedding and that when we are not around they talk about it behind our backs. My family has been nothing but supportive of the wedding and my Fiance, treating him like Gold.
If we have the wedding on his familys property it is a 45 minute drive for my family (who actually support it). My family has come to me several times, stating that they dont like the way FI’s family treats me and that they are going to feel uncomfortable and awkward around his family because they know how they feel about me and my family. And I agree, my wedding day is suppose to be happy, and carefree, not awkward and uncomfortable.
Is it not logical for me to move the wedding to my church where it will actually be supported??
Also, should I feel obligated to ask my FIL’s permission to move it to my church??
Post # 3
Makes perfect sense to me:-)
Post # 4
MOVE IT!! Move it to your church to save you, your Fiance and your family the stress and awkwardness! You’d be too worried about what his family is saying and thinking the entire day if you had it on their property.Also you do NOT need to ask their permission!! If they’re not paying for the entire wedding you do not have to ask their permission, only because your situation is unique. If any other bride to be asked this I’d say out of respect and courtesy, ask your FI’s parents but not in your situation.
Post # 5
You do nopt have to ask permission from anyone. It’s up to you and your Fi! Good luck!
Post # 6
Oh ick. His family sucks.
I’d move it to your church. Let them create drama if they want it, but at least you’ll be on home turf! Where would your reception be? Is your FH’s family contributing monitarily to the wedding at all? How many people are you inviting? Will this make it difficult for any of your friends to come?
Post # 7
Two months is plenty of lead-time to make this change. The bride’s own church is a traditional choice for the ceremony and the groom’s family normally have no say at all in that decision. Even if they did, I’d consider their negativity to date to BE tacit permission. The only person you need to consult is your husband-to-be himself. And your pastor, of course, to make sure the date is available.
Post # 8
My reception would be at a reception hall here in my hometown about 10 minutes away from the church. His family has contributed nothing, about 150 guests, and it would make it 10X easier for my friends to come.
Post # 9
Move it. Two months is plenty of time, and if Future In-Laws are like this now, it’ll just get worse. You don’t have to ask their permission, you don’t have to explain yourself, you just have to present a united front with your Fiance and say “we decided that we would prefer to have the wedding here”.
Post # 10
Move it, you don’t have to ask permission just say that you have always envisioned a church wedding and you have been thinking about it more and you would really like to have one. Don’t let them make your day miserable for you, if you are thinking about their disapproval now believe me it will only be worse on your wedding day!