Mrs Manners has spoken on complaining about you ring or proposal

posted 3 years ago in Rings
Post # 3
Member
753 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

THANK GOD SOMEONE SAID IT!!! i always want to write that on people’s posts when they complain about thier ring or proposal.. 

Post # 4
Member
3806 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

*slow clap*

 

LOVE THIS!

Post # 5
Member
182 posts
Blushing bee

OH THANK HEAVENS!!! My best friend was this way, she specifically goes out of her way to belittle girlfriends that don’t have massive rings. You can imagine her distate for my FI’s surprise low-key proposal. Personally, I loved it. I’ve always felt the importance of getting engaged and a proposal is not the manner but the heart behind it. My FI’s surprise cutesy proposal was WAY more “us” and meaningful than a flashdance in front of a crowd. And even though my first ring may not have been one I would have chose for myself, it was perfect because it was one he put time and effort (and not to mention $) into picking out just for me. LOVE LOVE LOVE that.

Post # 6
Member
2562 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

I read that one a few days ago. I was glad she responded like that!

That mom has a good head on her shoulders!

Post # 7
Member
671 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

Standing ovation over here. IT astounds me how many girls find themselves above whatever their FI could afford and the way he proposed. It comletely belittles what is of actual importance.

Post # 8
Member
1253 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

@carmelbride103:  Yes, yes, yes YES! Bravo, Mrs. Manners, and bravo to you for posting it.

Post # 9
Member
5207 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2013

My goodness! To question whether a “yes” or “no” is deserved based on just the proposal? That’s horrible! How shallow can someone be. Case in point: my husband and I dated for 11 years before getting married. I was only 15 when we met. He’s been with me through thick and thin, sickness and health, richer and poorer, respected me, loved me, supported me, and made me the happiest girl in the world. You know how he proposed to me? We were sitting around talking casually about who-knows-what and he blurted out “we gotta get hitched”. He never got down on one knee. I do not have an engagement ring. But I have no complaints.

Post # 11
Member
4223 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Ironically, I find the the tone of Ms.M’s response to be incredibly rude. :

A proposal is between two people, the ring is a decision between two people, and the marriage is between two people. Mom, mind your own buisness. If she wants it, and their relationship is open enough to discuss it, power to them. 

 

Post # 13
Member
1093 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Agreed on all points.

I hate that the focus has been put on the engagement/the wedding instead of the relationship between two people and preparation for marriage.

Post # 15
Member
7265 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2013

I think in this case, Miss Manners is correct, although only because the girl is second guessing marrying him. I think it’s fine for a woman to want to make ring changes if both members of the couple are on board for it.

Post # 16
Member
3222 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

I certainly agree with Miss Manners on this post, but I get irate when disliking the ring picked out for you is judged on this site.

Frankly, if my boyfriend picked out the wrong ring for me, or gave me an heirloom ring knowing I have a simple modern style, I’d begin to doubt whether he knows me at all, or whether he’s molded me into someone I clearly am not in his head. It doesn’t have to do with the THING, but rather, the PERSON. And if he lacks attention to detail enough to not know my very entrenched sense of style, then I’d probably get annoyed with anyway.

Your (generic) mileage may vary, but the above is important to think about when we gather to dismiss someone’s feelings as invalid or materialistic.

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