Post # 1
Speaking from experience as having various jobs at weddings in the past, it’s not fun most of the time, despite however close you may be to the couple. I’m simply curious if the general mindset anymore (anywhere in the wedding world) is that certain guests must be offered and given jobs to “honor” them and make them feel special, or what happened to just being a guest being an honor in itself?
Post # 3
With all due respect……unless I’m in the bridal party, I just want to come and hang out and enjoy the event……..
Post # 4
I’m with Maggie Mae, I just want to hang out! I’ve been a guest/worker before and didn’t mind it because it was something I had fun with (I set up the centerpieces and did a no-no by changing the design…but the bride and everyone LOVED it), but it’s not something I would want to do every time.
We aren’t having a bridal party because we don’t want ANYONE to have any responsibilities. My sister is bustling my dress and a close friend is officiating, that’s it. Everyone else just needs to come dance, eat, and celebrate! We’ve gotten some strange responses to that and lsome of my girlfriends are insisting that I give them something to help with, so maybe people really want to have something to do.
Post # 5
- Wedding: August 2010 - Ocean View Villas/Jasmine Seafood Restaurant
I agree that not everyone needs a job. We even had an uncle turn down our invitation to do a reading b/c he just wanted to enjoy the day and not worry about speaking or anything.
Post # 6
It really depends on the individual and their relationship to the couple. Some people want to feel like they played an important role in making the day a success.. Many people can be “just guests” but not many can say they were actively involved in it. I do like the relaxing feel of being just a guest, but I do also like to be chosen to help out
Post # 7
Obviously not! If you have 200 guests,there is no way that each of them can have a “job at the wedding”.
Decide what you want to do and who you want to do it and stop there.
Post # 8
@bells: I agree. Some people would be insulted to not be involved as and “official” part of the wedding. i had to make up roles for m FSILs becayse they were soooo upset about not being in my party.
I have one friend that is really upset about not being in my party and I think she would want a role (that I have yet to give her).
Others however I know are happy to be guests. If they are giving you a role they either really need the help or they think you want to be involved.
Post # 9
I agree! It’s just the bridal party! MAYBE some other key people. I know we are trying to find something for his older sister to do. Maybe sing or read. But everyone else is just attending!
Post # 10
I think that there are people that would see it as an honor to be involved especailly if they seemed upset about not being in the party. I would also ask your FI. Mom and FMIL and see if they think anyone is being “left out” of the day. There are a million little things you can ask people to do but you also should not feel like everyone wants to do something.