my 3 year old wants me to sleep in his bed with him.help?!?

posted 2 years ago in Parenting
Post # 2
Member
1230 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

Damiansmum10:  No is a love word. Stay strong and don’t give in. He’ll learn eventually. It’s either fight now for a couple weeks or deal with him crawling in your bed until he’s well past being a toddler. Pick your poison.

Post # 3
Member
42522 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Damiansmum10:  Has he been sleeping with you up until now? If you are trying to break that habit and potty train at the same time, that might be a bit much for any child.

You can start by sitting in  a chair. Reassure him that you will stay there until he is asleep.Gradually move your chair closer and closer to the door, then move it outside the door.

Post # 4
Member
442 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

Could you please use some punctuation and spaces in your posts? They are extremely difficult to read.

Post # 5
Member
544 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

sarals24:  I could read it just fine, and I don’t see how this was constructive to the question she was asking. Not trying to start an argument, just saying… I’m a grammar freak and it didn’t even bother me enough to complain about it.

Post # 7
Member
442 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

Not trying to be rude at all. These types of posts are just difficult to read, and I think she might get more responses if she used capitalization and spacing.

Post # 8
Member
6644 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Damiansmum10:  Does he have a night light? Maybe he is scared of “monsters”  Do you have a bed time routine?  My son is getting to the age where he is afraid of “monsters”  We read bed time stories and he has 2 night lights in his room plus a portable one he can have in his bed if he wants.  I also leave his door open (he wants it open)  

 

Post # 11
Member
1208 posts
Bumble bee

Front the other side my bro ended up sleeping in moms bed for AGES. AGEEEEES! Not all the time but every once in a while he would just crawl back  in there. Eventually he grew out of it, but it was obviously something that he needed.

I think that parents can forget that sometimes their kids NEED things. Why do you feel your child HAS to leave your bed now? Are you really doing it for them or for yourself?

Post # 12
Member
980 posts
Busy bee

I definitely agree with MrsGolden2Bee some kids need longer to grow out of things like this. It isn’t necessarily bad. I was a bit older than three when I was finally able to sleep by myself and I turned out okay. I had pretty bad separation anxiety and could not sleep otherwise. 

I think julies1949: makes a great point too that trying to do this and potty train at the same time would be really tough for him but I think the chair is a great idea. 

Post # 13
Member
21 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2015

Set a routine. Maybe explain that he can pick his favorite book and you can lay in bed with him and read it. But explain that after the book is read, it’s time for him to sleep and you leave the room. His crying hurts you more than it hurts him. If you stick to your guns and don’t go in there, he will fall asleep and soon it won’t even be an issue. My son used to want me to leave a light on in my bedroom. I think it made him feel better knowing I was still awake. He also knew that I would come in and check on him after he fell asleep. For him it was about comfort and knowing I was close by.

Post # 14
Member
2661 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

 

Damiansmum10:  My daughter went through this when she was about 2 and a half.  I stayed in her room in a chair, as long as she didn’t cry.  I slowly moved the chair further from her bed.  Took about 2 weeks of training her, but she stayed in her bed, and I didn’t feel like an ogre for making her cry.  And, I didn’t give in.

 

My daughter never slept with me, except as a little baby when she was nursing, so this came out of the blue.  She had been sleeping in her own room for at least 18 months when she decided she wanted to sleep with me.

  • This reply was modified 2 years, 3 months ago by  NavyBee.
Post # 15
Member
6749 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

We had gotten into a bad habit of sitting next to our daughter’s bed while she fell asleep.  And ofcourse she came to expect it.  It took 3 ugly nights of crying/tucking her back in/walking away to get her into a new routine.  The 3 nights were hard- but it got a little easier each night and now she knows we are right across the hall and are really there if she needs us. 

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