- 4 years ago
- Wedding: June 2014
My best friend is a guy I’ve known for 10+ years all throughout high school/college/grad. His own life stagnated while I kept on pursuing more school/different jobs. At this job that he’s been at for 7 years, he met a girl (coworker) she was dating every guy there including him. After all the cheating and lies (her on him), he will never leave her even though she has humilated him in front of his friends because we all caught her in the act cheating on him more than several times.
She has all the control in the relationship as its obvious he wont leave her after everything she put him through. She has insisted he cut off all ties with his friends ESPECIALLY ME. His family know me, are invited to my wedding, my FI has asked him to be a groomsmen and he said yes. Us 3 are very close, vacation together, vegas trips, we all share the same sense of humor. She is a stick in the mud, antisocial, throws fits, and in my own home when I invited her to stay with us to take a trip to SF, she had the nerve to tell me to remake the food I made for everyone because she has recently turned vegetarian/vegan (not true at all, I’ve seen the girl eat meat).
There is so much more I want to say about how awful she is, she goes clubbing/bar crawling gets blacked out drunk and then calls my best friend to come pick her up and clean up after her and he does. She treats him like her bitch.
She told him she does not want him talking to me or my FI anymore and because my best friend is a huge pushover he has dealt with this problem by creating google voice numbers, renaming me, using a separate application to receive my or FI text messages/phone calls to hide it from her. Its obvious he is obsessed/clingy needs her as she is always the one throwing ultimatums of leaving him and he is giving in. He still wants to be friends with us as he recently took a vacation with us to go snowboarding however he lied to her and told her it was visiting family etc. How should I feel that our relationship with our best friend is being treated like “the other woman.” At all of these events she is invited but she chooses not to go, she instead has thrown fits and called him NON STOP while he was out eating dinner with us getting dessert or something threatening to kill herself or something if he does not go home immediately and spend time with her.
I have never received an invitation from her to do anything, she has never welcomed me in her own home, cooked for me, took me on a free vacation like I have done for her. my FI and I really care for my best friend, and don’t want to lose him but slowly its turned into our friendship with him having to be a secret because she doesn’t want him associating with anyone but her and her friends. Do I have any say, should I do anything? Should I be feeling this bad? He hasn’t stopped being a good friend, takes our calls, messages, helps us with our cars ( he has mechanic certifications) from time to time and we help him in return.
I dont want to lose him over her but it looks like its slowly happening with him keeping his friendships a secret.