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I am so with you on opening mail not addressed to you. I do accounts payable and receiveable for my family business. Just last month I had 10 accounts that were past due. So I called them asking for payment status. All of them said they had mailed me a check on the same days. The following week I go to the PO Box and in there is a stack of opened mail paperclipped together. It was all the checks that had been missing. They even endorsed them on the back.
How in the world could someone, a) not notice 10 pieces of mail not addressed to them b) open them and then try to cash them!
Crazy!!!
Who knows if she's the one that opened it. But why send it back if you don't plan to go, why not just toss it in the trash.
Crazy!!!
That is so odd! But, I wouldn't assume she opened it because I had a roommate that would open ANYTHING addressed to someone else. Some people are simply nosy. If you're positive you sent it to the correct address, nothing was spelled incorrectly, no numbers were off then there is a problem. Since she's also not answering her phone you're gonna have to be direct. Leave her a message saying that you've been trying to get a hold of her to no avail, you want to make sure everything's alright and you need to speak to her about the wedding. You don't have much time, but I wouldn't stress it just yet, maybe she's going through something?
Weddings do really bring out strange characteristics in peoples personalities! They should do a study on it, I bet they have already!
I just moved and we have gotten bills from the past residents. But we are also getting tons of ads and junk mail from local businesses. So I have accidentally opened their mail because I just saw it was from a local electric company or something and didn't scrutinize the address. I guess I just assume that if it is in my mailbox, it is for me. But it is always an accident.
I had my parents next door neighbor's invite returned. The people lived next door to me for my entire life- their address was correct.
I took it back to the post office and demanded that they send it again because the address was correct. So with nasty black marker, the PO worker scribbled all over it and tossed it in with the mail. I felt really bad- it looked hideous. If I had known he was going to deface it, I'd have purchased a new stamp!
I've gotten stuff addressed to me that has been opened. Sometimes wonder if it isn't the machines or the mailmen/women. Maybe your envolopes were so pretty they wanted to see inside! 
As for the BM, call her, email her, do whatever to get ahold of her. That is strange she has been MIA for awhile and you need to know she is 1) ok and 2) still going to be in the wedding
Um that is really fishy.
You're sure its the right address & she's avoiding your calls? Does she live near you? Can you stop by to see whats up?
I don't know why weddings bring out the crazy in everyone.
Hmm perhaps your wedding is just too much for her financially & she doesn't want to tell you? If you didn't have some major falling out this behaviour is really strange...
She lives in TN and I'm in GA.
She IS a little.... urm, different. She doesn't hold down a job for very long, and her dad basically pays all of her bills, but I asked if it was going to be a financial strain and she promised it wouldn't be. She was really weird about accepting as a BM. She wanted to be the MOH. I don't know if that has something to do with it.
The envelope was slit all of the way across the top, stapled back together, and the rsvp card was moved, too. SO weird! We've been friends since 6th grade, and we're both in our 30's now, so I had no doubts about her being there.
I guess it IS a possibility that her dad shut off her cell or something. I guess because the invite was opened, I assumed she saw it, but maybe she never got it and someone was just nosy!
My neighbour had a bad habit of sending back mail accidently placed in his mailbox as "wrong address" ... yes he even opened some of it, and instead of walking it next door he sent it back ... he was an @$$hole!
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And it had been <span style="font-weight: bold;">OPENED!
Now, if it really is the wrong address, and it's addressed to someone that doesn't live there, and it has a return address of someone you don't know - why in he** would you OPEN IT?? <span style="font-style: italic;">Rude!
And - I KNOW i addressed it to the right address. And she's not answering her phone calls, and hasn't for a while now. Something is fishy.
We're five weeks out. Why do weddings bring out the weirdness in people (assuming she really opened it and sent it back)?