Post # 1
When i first asked my bridesmaids to stand up I told them about their dresses and how I was going to let them all pick out their own so they would find something they would want to wear again. I told all of them to make sure it was solid black. I also said “remember to keep it classy and simplicity was key”
So far everyone has done great, exactly what I visioned 🙂 That is up until today. My maid of honor starts telling me she’s borrowing a dress from a friend and begins describing it to me: “It’s black it goes to a little above my knee and it’s body shaped, like a spandex material and it’s a tubetop (strapless)” I told her it sounded a bit sexy to me and she says “it is, I thought that was a good thing”
Then she begins telling me she bought a white hair flower for her hair! When she knows I purchased a white hair flower for mine. Am I being a bit of a bridezilla, when I think as the bride, I should be the only one wearing a white flower in my hair? I don’t know, maybe I’m over reacting, but I wouldn’t wear that dress to a wedding, ecspecially if I was standing up in it.
I just want a few suggestions on how I should deal with this situation. Thanks Bee’s!!!
Post # 3
That dress does sound a bit…not classy. Could you ask her to wear a bolero with it? Or maybe offer to buy her a different dress?
And the hair flower…ya, tell her she can’t wear it. Be nice about it, but tell her that you don’t want her to match the bride.
Post # 4
yeah you’re not being a bridezilla…is there another bridesmaid who dress you really like that could just do a comparison? i’m thinking that if she saw the others she might realize how inappropriate hers is. then you don’t have to hurt her feelings. OR you could be direct about it, and especially since she’s borrowing it that def. works in your favor. Tell her she can’t wear the white flower….She should understand, tell her it’s too close to what you’re wearing and you want to be unique.
Post # 5
Hair flowers are really easy to make! Maybe you could make some for your BM that are smaller than yours and colored to match your wedding, then tell her you are making her a special one to wear.
As for the dress, I would ask to see it. At least she borrowed it so she didn’t invest money. If she can’t afford a new dress maybe you could help her or find a different dress she could borrow!
Post # 6
Since she’s your MOH, I’m guessing you’re pretty close to her? I’d just have a gentle but direct conversation with her. My dearest friend and Best Woman went way out on a limb with the shoes she picked out. I pointed out the reservations I had about them and she agreed with me! I hated having to say something, I also felt like a Bridezilla. But I think if she’s your friend, she wil totally understand.
Post # 7
Well, since you didn’t give her much of a description of your “vision,” you can’t be too upset that she didn’t get the kind of dress you wanted. Classy and simple can also be sexy. That being said, since she is only borrowing the dress, you should tell her that isn’t what you envisioned and have the other bridesmaids send her photos of their dresses. And the flower in the hair is DEFINITELY not okay, let her know you were thinking of doing something like that and you’d rather be the only one with a flower in your hair. Good luck!
Post # 8
Thanks girls 🙂 I sent out a mass email to all my ladies asking to send me pictures of their dresses just so I can get a vision of how they’ll look on the big day I’ll take those pictures and send them to my MOH so she can “hopefully” see her dress doesn’t cut it. and i already told her about the flower how she could wear her hair anyway she wanted to but I ‘m wearing the flower and I want to stand out since i’m the bride. and all she said was “oh…. okay” I’ve got too many other things on my mind i’m not going to let this get to me 🙂
Post # 9
(you posted just before me! lol!)
it IS your wedding, so you get the final say in what goes and what doesn’t. 🙂
have you asked to see her in the dress? though spandex doesn’t sound classy to me, maybe if you see her in the dress, especially since you’ve asked for pics of the other dresses) you’ll know for certain. and, like you said, you can even line ’em all up and point out hers clashes….