- 7 years ago
- Wedding: August 2011
Honestly, I would love to have just one post saying something positive like I’ve won a million bucks or something.
But instead, 2 days before my wedding, I have come to post that my father will no longer be participating in our celebration.
I have posted before about my relationship with my father. My mother and him are still married after 25 years of pretty much hell. He was physically abusive to my mom, my brother and I (and I still think he is but my mother doesn’t want to tell me). He is still verbally abusive (calling my mom an idiot, stupid, slut etc).
In our family, I have been the one to try and be the “grown up”. To move on from the past and build a relationship with him. I constantly have to walk on egg shells because he is the type of person that you just can never tell how he will be. One day you say something to him and he laughs, the next day you can say the exact same thing and he curses you out.
For a while I worried that his behavior really had to do with me. But as I have gotten older, I realized that it is actually just him. My fiance sees it also.
He is the type of person that makes up his own reality in his head. If I say something to him, he will turn around and say something completely opposite from what I said.
Well, to try and make a long post short, we got into an argument yesterday because he was just in one of those moods. I was talking to my mom about a few things I had to get done. He was in the room and was miserable since he got home from work. He offered to go out and do something and I said “No worries, Ill be out anyways so I can do it” …. so because I didn’t accept his help , he said that my mom and I can’t do shit because we waste time and that I can go fuck myself (those choice words exactly).
After that sweet suggestion, I basically told him that he has a terrible attitude and he needs to start changing. And obviously he didnt like that so he started cursing me out. I turned to him and told him that he needs to humble himself and appologize because he is in the wrong in this situation. And I told him that I wont beg him to come to the wedding.
So, he later calls Fiance to tell him a completely different story then what happened. Saying that I freaked out on him for no reason (my mom was there so she knows what happened). And that I told him not to come to the wedding (which I did not). So now he said he is not coming.
*sigh* so ya sorry this post is so long. I am just so miserable. Everything was going so well. I feel like if he comes, he will just be miserable the whole time and make it seem like he was forced to go. I know for a fact he will NEVER appologize (he never has for ANYTHING he has done to any of us). And if he doesnt come, well I guess that is bad too.
I’m so sick of trying to fix things with him. It’s always “well you know how he is, so just try to make the best of it” I dont understand how he gets this pass to be a jerk and everyone around him is just supposed to deal with it.