(Closed) My Dad’s girlfriend is wearing the same color as family and MOB?????

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
4824 posts
Honey bee

did she know she was requested to not wear black, white and the other colors? I think black is a very popular color and you will get many guests as well wearing that color.

Post # 4
Member
1537 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I think you need to take a minute and step back to take a breath. Firstly, I highly doubt your dad’s girlfriend will be the only person other than the family and bridal party who is wearing black. The term “Little Black Dress” didn’t come from no where. I think it’s actually a pretty common shade for dressing up, and that includes weddings. Now, I can see how maybe it might be offensive if she was wearing a coral dress with teal accessories because those are your colors, but honestly…it’s black. She probably didn’t even know those were the shades you are using. I don’t think it’s the end of the world. It may seem stressful right now, but it really isn’t something you should let get the best of you. Everything will work out if you try to stay calm 🙂

Post # 5
Member
5494 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2011

Well, I hate to break this to you, but there will probably be many more guests who are not part of the family or bridal party who will also be wearing a black dress.  It’s the most common and “safe” color choice for formal attire.  I don’t think you have a right to be mad about this. It’s not like you have some extremely unique color that she went out of her way to find a dress in.  sorry.

Post # 6
Member
236 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

It’s ok to feel upset, but try to let this one go. She’s wearing black, and probably didn’t realize it was a conflict. She’s a grown woman and gets to decide what she is going to wear. A black, tailored dress is wedding appripriate; she spent $ to get it tailored for your wedding, which says something. Let this one go. Good luck! 🙂

Post # 8
Member
1276 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

My guess is that a few guests will also end up wearing black to the wedding. I see how it could be disrespectful to the mothers, but then it’s such a common dress color that I’m sure other people would do the same. 

However, I would speak up if she knew ahead of time and was doing it to be disrespectful on purpose. Is she a reasonable woman that you may have a polite conversation with? 

Post # 9
Member
14503 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

I think that you should just let it drop.  I think that you will see that alot of guests are wearing black to your wedding as it is a common standby anymore.  Besides, it is a little thing that you really don’t need to stress yourself about so close to your wedding.  I really don’t think that your mom will be upset about the color of the dress, but she will be more upset about him having a date no matter what.  That is just human nature. 

Post # 10
Member
4824 posts
Honey bee

@cashlee1023: Again, did she know she wasnt “supposed to wear black”. If she didnt, matching anyone isnt bad ettiquette (especially in black)

EDIT: If it really bothers you (and I dont think it should- ther are more important items to think about like your marriage!) I think you should apologize to your father because inadvertantly you insulted him and his relationship. I would then ask very nicely if she would wear a colored shawl…  But as a girlfriend, is she going to be in the pictures? If not, forget it. No one will notice the “matching” dresses because they will be wearing similar!

If mom REALLY wanted to stand out she would not have picked black. But as MOB she will stand out no matter what because of her role.

Post # 11
Member
1088 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I understand you are upset. But I think you should let it go or at least not say anything. I had soooooooo many people who came wearing our wedding colors and what could I say? they are allowed to wear whatever they want. My step mom wore blue and I was totally fine with it as she is family. And your dad’s GF could be family too, although I know it must really hurt, try and keep peace for your dad’s sake and don’t talk about it too much with your mom. You have enough going on I’m sure. Just focus on you and your day and support your mom as best you can.

Post # 12
Member
1537 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

@cashlee1023: I think you are taking this too personally. It’s supposed to be a happy, positive day. If you can remember that then nothing will mess up your day! It’s about you and your SO and showing everyone your commitment to one another. Try to stay positive and when these little things get to you just remind yourself of all of the things you are excited and happy about 🙂

Post # 13
Member
34 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2007

@lefeymw:I agree you on that. I understand what you mean and totaly get the point of what you are saying. Don’t stress this right before your wedding maybe she can add a little color so she can be different then the rest of yor bridal party and family. Like red shoes or pink I don’t know a color skirt I mean something.

Post # 15
Member
4824 posts
Honey bee

@cashlee1023: Think of it this way… if your mom, dad or sibling or even friend made a comment about your now fiance that you didnt like when he was a bf, wouldnt you be defensive?

The topic ‘My Dad’s girlfriend is wearing the same color as family and MOB?????’ is closed to new replies.

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