- 3 years ago
- Wedding: June 2013
I have had something on my mind since my wedding I think many others have mentioned here as well. My wedding is almost three weeks ago and it was a real blast. I really loved my dress and everyone else told me that this is the best dress they have ever seen. I had friends and family incoming from all around the world. I was totally happy with my hair and mak-up. There were a lot of young people so it was a great party and friends I had talked to said they had lots of fun, some even said they would want their wedding to be like this. I was happy when we came to the hotel that night (even euphoric).
But then something strange happened. Talking to people, being reminded of little and not so little things that went wrong my wedding memory by now is totally distorted. Things started bugging me and as everyone was looking at me as the bride I think everyone noticed every little faupaux of mine.
1. As I said: best dress ever, however , since it was strapless and after moving a lot it tended to fall down a bit and I had to tug it a few times. I think it is no big deal, however, when friends started telling me “oo yes I guess your dress was falling down you were tugging a lot” I felt ashamed.
2. And this is a big issue for me at the moment: when the dancing started it started to rain a little bit, I was shocked for about a minute and everyone saw it, but then I was fine and started to be more cool about it. However, after a while it started raining more and we had to move in for about half an hour (then we went out again). Inside was big enough but the air was really bad and we had quite chaotic 15 minutes or so where most wedding guest simply stayed outside and I felt really down because I thought the wedding is over before it started. This was also the fault of the vendor because she immediately ordered that the tables and chairs would be collected when it started to rain (she of course did not care how that would affect the guests, she was afraid her tables and chairs would get wet). And that moment I simply panicked.
I had promised myself to be a cool and happy bride and I was for 90% of the 7-hour wedding (we had an after part until 2 AM which was nice as well), however, after the wedding 3-4 of my female friends started saying that I was much too occupied with the rain, and that I looked sad for a while. That really put me on the defensive. I increasingly got the feeling I had to legitimate why I was down for about 15 minutes. Gush it rained and yes it was traumatic for me and I could not just laugh it away but afterwards I was fine.
Now I am thinking that everyone will remember me as this stressed-out bride who made a fuss about nothing. I really was afraid of giving this image (because I don’t like when brides do that), and I sometimes feel that people expect so much of a “performance” of a bride that they forget that she is a human being who cannot smile for 7 hours, and who is exhausted and of course stressed :((
Well this is a very chaotic post, but it really gets to me that I am left with these regrets and feeling of guilt that I did not have during the wedding (despite the short stressful moments).
Can anyone relate?