Post # 1
We were married for 26 years. He divorced me last year, remarried, his second marriage lasted TWO WEEKS!!! About six months after the divorce we began dating again. I love him. I am learning to trust him, my heart was kicked to the curb. But I am NOT chasing him, he has to pursue me, he has to be the man. I am being very careful. The family gave me the family rings to give to my son and his FI and I was offered a massive diamond ring, his Mom’s 2 carat flawless blue diamond, with at least another 1 1/2 cts of other diamonds sprinkled on. She loves her diamonds. But the family owns a very famous jewelry store in New York, so it is like a plumber buying his wife a new wrench. Diamonds are nice, but LOVE is worth much more. Yes, we have been to a lot of therapy, will have to go to more, but I think we have made a good path towards remarrying each other. Sounds crazy.
Have you or have you known anyone who has done this? I am a woman of faith and I know G-d took me out of that marriage for a reason. The biggest thing i have noticed, in change in my ex husband, is he is far more mature and he realizes he is not the only person in this relationship. If you have any advice, or prayers to offer, please share. Thanks, Jobelle
Post # 2
One of my ex-boyfriend’s parents got divorced twice and married/remarried three times. They have been together for probably a good eight years since their last divorce/remarriage episode and seem to be doing well. I guess a lot of it would depend on the reasons for the divorce, but I don’t think remarriage would be odd or out-of-the-norm.
Post # 3
Just remind yourself that maybe the reason that God let the marriage end was so your ex would learn and grow, which you said it seems he has. If you feel you can trust him again and you both work on making your relationship stronger there is no reason it wont work! I will keep you guys in my prayers.
Post # 4
I personally think exes are exes for a reason. But only you know what is right for you.
2 carat flawless blue diamond sounds nice though. 🙂
Post # 5
26 years is a very long time and I’m a firm believer in, “we don’t miss it until it’s gone”. If you see positive change in your Mr., you love him & there is a mutual desire to grow together, then why not?! I am sending you prayers & well wishes!! That is an exciting, yet scary predicament. You sound like you are proceeding with caution and that’s all that anyone can do. There would be no guarantees with a new person just as there are none with an old person.
Post # 6
I think you both should go to therapy as a couple and work out issues that may come up again that were detrimental in your relationship the first time. This will also help you guys have a very solid foundation before you guys get remarried. Best of luck to you both.
Post # 7
BeeLoveHeart: completely agree. That was a lot to happen in such a brief period of time compared to the 26 years you were together. You have to address ALL of the issues in the relationship past or present before you can move forward. Just go with your gut. You know deep down whether you should be spending your time with this man again, especially if you feel that the marriage ended for a reason.
Post # 8
- Wedding: July 2014 - Prague
I never say never– if you think your ex has learned from his nonsense and knows what he’s doing now, then go for it. Therapy? YES. Probably a good idea.
Post # 9
My SIL’s parents split up when she was a teenager, and remarried a few years later. SIL is now in her 40’s and her parents are still going strong!
Best of luck to you!
Post # 10
It sounds lile your ex might like the chase more than the relationship. Why did you divorce?
Post # 11
- Wedding: March 2014 - A castle!
2 of my uncles have married their first wives a second time after divorces. The wives jokingly refer to them as their second husbands. I don’t think you can compare situations to others. It will come down to trust, compatibility, love and respect. If you have those 4 things I think it makes for a strong marriage. I would say don’t go jumping back into marriage with this guy – there was a reason you divorced him. Maybe if you could give us some more background we could give you better advice.
Post # 12
If my husband divorced me to marry someone else, there is no way in hell that I would take him back. Too many fish in the sea to be with someone fickle who doesnt value me as a partner or as an individual.
Post # 13
If you think that he has grown since you divorced and you are both happy, I don’t see anything wrong with it. My best friend’s parents got a divorce, both went into different relationships (each having a child with another person) and then got remarried to each other a few years later. They have a wonderful relationship now.
If I were in your shoes, however, I would continue with the counseling as a couple to make sure that the issues that caused your divorce in the first place have been dealt with.
Post # 14
Elizabeth Taylor. But I don’t think it worked out too well for her…
Post # 15
Just be very cautious and move slowly. Maybe tell him you need at least a year to rebuild the relationship, and reevaluate the proposal after that year has passed.
The biggest thing is to keep in mind why you divorced, and make sure those issues, and all other issues are resolved. Best of luck to you 🙂