- Blog
- Bios
- Boards
- Classifieds
- DIY
- Gallery
- Vendor Reviews
- Shop Weddingbee
Weddingbee boards
My parent's didn't save up for my wedding but with 4 other girls I do not blame them! They had a large family to raise and they did the best job they could in helping have a great childhood. I know it feels a little unfair sometimes when I hear how other brides have outside financial means to plan their wedding, but in the end I'm doing the best I can and am proud that I can save so much money on my own. FI helps but he is still finishing his credential program and has another year to go so basically it's on me to save. Thankfully i have a great job! EEEh now I feel gulty about being online, I have stuff to do! hehehe Actually the bee helps me get through the day faster which allows me to work better! Love how I can justify this!
I'm Latin and I have none of my own funds to pay for my wedding, but I hope to start saving soon when my fiancee moves in so we can both save up. I was raised by a single mother, and she always told me to save but I never did and now I am getting married next March and no budget.
Hi. I will be Mrs.Taylor too next year! I don't think it's fair for you to expect your family to pay for your wedding. I am getting married in August of 2011 and my fiance and I will be paying for EVERYTHING. I wouldn't even feel comfortable asking family members for donations in this economy. If you can't afford what you want you should consider a longer engagement to save up, or cut down on unnecessary expenses. You can't have champagne wishes on a beer budget and expect others to help. BTW I am black too. Just my two cents...
my mom didn't have anything to give, but she did pay for some of my dress, just because she really wanted to contribute. For everything else, we are pretty much splitting it with his family, which is totally untraditional, but right for us.
Wow I never thought this post would generate so many comments. Umm I wasn't trying to offend anyone. If I did...oh well. I don't expect my family to pay for anything. This was just a thought of mine. Some of you need to take chill pills lol.
My Mom had a Vera Wang account for us when we were growing up. When I got engaged I was shocked my parents didn't offer to pay for the wedding-but my Mom told me she lost 6 figures when the stock market got all crazy a couple years ago. So I completely understand, my parents did pay for my dress-but I had to ask. I think that may be the thing, not that AA parents don't pay or save up to pay, but that they don't pay unless asked and only for specific things.
The good thing is since we are paying for almost everything we have 100% say so on our wedding. We don't have to please anyone except ourselves. I think if our parents paid we would have to do what they wanted us to do for a wedding not our dream.
Good Luck with your planning and learn to negotiate!
We are an AA couple (if you couldnt tell by my pic lol) and had no expectations of having family paying for ANYTHING at first...due to the economy, (and i just felt plain rude asking) we assumed that we would be footing the bill ourselves..our motto, "just show up and party!" ...then came the wonderful blessings along the way....my mom paid for my beautiful dress and veil, my aunt is picking up the costs for our (expensive) flowers, and most recently my parents are giving us a large sum of money that will cover more than half of the wedding expenses!!!!
So I really don't think its a race or class issue either, but with a lot of people, the ecomony has really put them under!!!!
First dont feel bad! Second Do what you can do with what you have!
This day is about you and your FI! if you can only affor 20 ppl then only have 20 ppl there. If you want shrimp and lobster have shrimp and lobster. You can always have a second reception where all your friends and extend family can be in attendance! There is no need to kill yourself over one day! You love your FI he loves you, your family loves your union and you have to take solice in that.
BTW my FI and I are paying for our wedding as well. We are blessed enough to have well paying jobs and very little debt.
But do what makes you happy because this event is all about the two of you.
Peace and blessings!
I helped supplement my parents' measly income so I'm not expecting them to come up with a huge sum for my wedding. Once they found out I'm engaged, they refused my help so that I can save for the wedding. It looks like my sister will be getting married too!
Its not a racial thing. My parents are giving us 2500 for our wedding but I never wanted my parents to help pay for our wedding completely. I don't think you should expect your parents to pay for anything. Its a nice gesture if they do but thats it. I think if you want this wedding that you see on TV you need to start saving up for that wedding.
Good Luck!
I can't say its because you are black. My family isn't helping much with my wedding financially but the show will go on. My dad passed away when I was young and in my heart I know he would have paid for my wedding. My brother got married and his wifes dad spent 25k on their wedding and they are black so it isn't a color thing its more of a proper planning thing.
Nope it's not a black think, both my hubby and I are AA and we paid for our own little wedding and it was wonderful. I wasn't expecting any help from our families and because we are financially stable I would have turned it down if they offered anyway. You are not alone, a lot of us in this generation are paying for our own nuptials, it's not as traditional as it used to be and the rules are being bent to fit your particualar situation. Congratulations and i'm sure your special day will be beautiful.
i think that if anything its more class/socioeconomic status than race but that doesnt mean race doesnt play a role because culture is infused in everything that we do by default
\WIth that being said, my parents have offered to handle some wedding things...for instance when i found my dress, my mother offered to pay for half...
another example we are getting amrried in my parents backyard and they offered to pay the landscaping costs (although i think they were justy looking for a reasdon to spruce things up lol
My FI's family has not offered to contribute anything as far as i am aware
We are paying for our wedding mostly ourselves and will take gifts along the way. I do agree taht it is easier to get money for specific things versus just trying to get money!
Good Lucka dn Smile youre day will be beautiful regardless!
It definitely is a common thing, many families are struggling just to make ends meet in these economic times. I paid for our wedding and hubby paid for the honeymoon. 5K for the wedding, simple reception afterwards and a pig roast the next day. A beautiful wedding does NOT have to cost a lot of money. Focus on what you REALLY want, and search for the best prices. Get a little bit at a time.
Wow I really dont understand why she said black people done save for weddings... Im white my family didnt save for my wedding. Im also in college and paying for my own. I really wouldnt sweat it though because now days most parents/guardians dont save for weddings... Get as much mula as you can and that would be your budget. My whole wedding bugdet it 5000... im half way there! Good luck.
You must log in to post.
| Visit our sister sites | eHarmony Online Dating |
eHarmony Advice Dating Advice |
Project Wedding Wedding Songs |
JustMommies Pregnancy Calendar |
Create the honeymoon of your dreams.
| User | Posts Today |
|---|---|
| Rojocameo | 16 |
| Rivendeler | 15 |
| kat2014 | 12 |
| lionskitty | 9 |
| Suikerbossie | 9 |
| ellisrobertson | 9 |
| dysia_79 | 8 |
| bookworm88 | 8 |
| Future Mrs K | 8 |
| ladyrosetexas | 8 |
| User | Posts Today |
|---|---|
| shychigirl | 1 |
