- 6 years ago
- Wedding: July 2014
I announced my engagement to my family at different times, but I told the last of them today. A little bit of a background: my fiance and I are both 20, and have been together for 2 1/2 years. We are planning on getting married two years from now, which will be the summer after our college graduation, and both of our parents are divorced.
Everyone was generally happy and excited except for my dad, stepmom, and my dad’s family. I do not have a very good relationship with them, and have been doing basically everything (bills, buying a car, paying for clothes, food) on my own since I was 17. The first thing my stepmom said was that we’d better wait until long after college graduation to get married. They said that they did not like the idea and started coming up with a checklist of things that needed to happen before we could proceed. They both said that they “wished I had experienced more of my young life” and that going all the way through college with a boyfriend/fiance is the wrong thing to do. They also stated that they don’t like him, and that they think he is the wrong choice for a husband.
I understand that I am young and that marriage is a mature decision. But being married and having a family is one of the biggest priorities in my life. I do not take it lightly, and I will never get divorced because I don’t believe in it. For me, this is 100% a lifelong commitment because I grew up in an environment of divorce. It hurts me that my family doubts my ability to make mature decisions, and does not like my fiance. It hurts me even more that they cannot set aside their doubts and simply be happy for me, which is all I really want. I don’t want people constantly telling me what to do, I just want this to be the beginning of my life with him.
Does anyone have any advice about how to handle this?