My Father Passed Away, Who Walks Me Down the Aisle?

posted 2 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 2
612 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

You can say it exactly like that.  If she is your mother she should understand.  I’d be 100% sure you aren’t going to change your mind later though and want it back – that’s not something you can really go back and forth on.

Post # 3
195 posts
Blushing bee

I would just tell her the walking down the aisle feels like a dad job and you feel like given his passing, you would like to honor him by walking alone.

Give her another job. Can she, say, walk you into the ceremony, and let you go from there? 

Post # 4
1437 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I agree with PPs, but I also think that something that might be nice for you, and help it make more sense to your mother, is if you have a small picture of your father, maybe tied around your bouquet, to make it feel even more like he is with you.

Post # 5
232 posts
Helper bee

My father has passed away too. At first I thought my brother could walk me down the aisle, but then I thought that was a little sexist, when my mother is alive, to choose a teenager to play a parent’s role just because he’s male. I considered having my mother do it. At the end though decided that I would walk together with my SO. 

In my opinion, don’t tell her that it’s a father’s job, but just that you would rather do it with your FI and not have anyone give you away. I think your mother would understand. Tell her about the dance and make her feel loved and appreciated in other ways.

Post # 6
14 posts
  • Wedding: May 2017

slianne:  Do you have any brothers? I’d have a brother walk me down the aisle.. But if you don’t then walking down the ailse alone is not a bad thing. If your mother is understanding then she won’t be upset that you rather walk the aisle with a brother or alone and have your future husband meet you half way.

Post # 7
242 posts
Helper bee

I am walking alone down the aisle, even though  my father is alive. Its complicated as most things are but I feel right walking by myself. I do agree with pp to make sure you are 100% positive on what you want before talking to your mother.

Post # 8
4483 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

I say whoever you want, whether that person is another man, a woman, or nobody.

Post # 9
4656 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

Both of my parents have passed away. My grandfather Was going to do it but he passed away the day after we got engaged. Now I’m walking myself. I don’t see any problem with telling your mom exactly what you typed and maybe giving her another job to do the day of!

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