My FH is a picky, unhealthy eater!

posted 3 years ago in Wellness
Post # 3
1892 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

IMO you need to stop catering to his likings when you cook. If you cook something healthy… and put it in front of him… tell him.. eat it or make soemthing yourself..


also healthy doesnt mean nasty tasting.. I would work new things into the meal plan slowly! 

Post # 4
1892 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

For example.. 

Buffalo chicken SALAD:

Grill some chicken and toss it in hot sauce.. put over some greens with cut up celery and carrots in it.. and some bluecheese crumbles and dressing..(try to go light on the dressing so it doesnt over power all the other flavors)


Post # 5
8678 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

I am a supremely picky eater. I am the cook in the house so my husband deals with me.

If I were you, I’d cook healthy foods and give it to him. Require him to at least give it one bite (That’s a requirement in my home. You have to at least taste it.) If you don’t like it, you make something for yourself, otherwise nothing else is being made.

Post # 6
10454 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2011

Tacos can be healthy depending what’s on them.  Maybe use that as a bit of a starting place?

Post # 7
42157 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I would refuse to be party to him killing himself- and me. His cholesterol level is soon going to be through the roof, if it’s not already.

I would tell him that from now on, I am cooking healthy meals and it is his choice to eat them , or not. If he doesn’t, he can get himself something else.

You could try making healthier versions of things you know he likes- cheeseburger and fries made with lean meat, chicken or beggie burger, and baked yam fries.

Post # 9
8678 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

@leenh78:  Prep is key. You don’t have to make a full meal from scratch every night. Prepare ingredients beforehand and either store them in the fridge or freeze them. Then all you have to do is combine and/or cook.

When I was growing up, tiredness was never an excuse for a lack of a homecooked meal (Not passing any judgement to you, just saying how it was when I grew up) and my father worked two jobs while my mother worked full time. My dad, while cooking, would portion out ingredients for the next day if he was having a long day. That way we could just throw it in a bowl/pan for dinner the next night. Mushrooms, lettuce, tomato, meat, bread, everything was pre-portioned out, put into individual bowls/bags/etc to be used for the next dinner.

Post # 10
339 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

My sister used to eat healthily. Then she got engaged to a guy at university who had a diet like the above, she resisted it while they lived seperately but once they moved in together and he wouldn’t eat anything else so she ended up cooking the same for her to save time or eating the same takeaway to save going out for something else. 15 years later they’re still together, have been engaged for ten years and both desperately overweight and unhappy with themselves. I used to eat badly but when I started living with FI it changed because he eats so well, I would hate for you to get stuck eating what he eats and going down the same path. Maybe you could talk to a doctor and get him to give him a health scare or something? Even if he isn’t physically overweight that kind of diet wont be doing him much good on the inside!

Post # 12
7 posts
  • Wedding: August 2014

Mine is the exact same way!! As someone mentioned, tacos are a good starting point…you can use shredded chicken breast or lean ground turkey instead of ground beef, and then you can at least load yours up w/ veggies and black beans. When we do burgers we also use lean ground turkey instead of beef (and sometimes I’ll have a veggie burger) and then I make homemade sweet potato fries on the side.

It is a pain sometimes, since I try to eat really healthy and he won’t eat half of the stuff I’d want to make, but I’ve learned to adapt. One thing I’ll try and do is “sneak” veggies into the meal, like if we have pasta I will use whole wheat pasta and hide sauteed fresh spinach in the sauce. Or if we do meatballs I will shred some zucchini and hide that in with the lean ground turkey. I will say that he has gotten a lot better since we started dating three years ago, as some stuff I just make and force him to try. There are a number of things he wouldn’t even touch back in the day that now he really likes.

A great website is skinnytaste. A lot of her recipes are comfort/fatty foods that are lightened up quite a bit. I’ve made a bunch of recipes off of the site and they’ve all turned out really good!

Post # 13
10219 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

YIKES… that isn’t a very extensive / healthy list of choices is it.

First and foremost, I’d sit him down and have a heart-to-heart with him.  Tell him that his diet isn’t the healthiest, and at 35 this is gonna start to catch up with him by the time he’s 40.  By the time he’s 50 there may be no “forgiveness” in regards to the future… he could very well have a heart attack and die (having seen this myself now a few times to guys of this age… and it sucks for their Wives & Families).

Tell hiim that isn’t what you want for him, and you are sure that isn’t what he wants for you or himself either.

I’ve certainly seen friends & family members struggle with Picky Eaters before… altho most of them have fit into the “Meat & Potatoes” category.

I recommend tho that the solution might be the same, just keep offering up more choice so as to expand their palate.

Tell him that YOU can’t live like this either… you need to make healthier choices for yourself, and don’t plan to be a short-order cook for him.  So you guys will need to negotiate a change…

Start with maybe 3 meals a week your way, and 4 meals a week his (altho add on healthier sides that you can eat more of… and he can try or not).  So instead of JUST Take Out Pizza, add on a Salad (One with heavy dressing we agree isn’t best… BUT it is a start… Caesar or Italian does make a nice accompaniment to Pizza.  And eventually you can get to a point where you can do the Dressing on the side, so they’ll be less of it, etc)

The 3 Nights you cook at home… try a lot of different things.  Eventually you’ll find some stuff he’ll like / comment on.

So in a month or twos time when you are Grocery Shopping / Meal Planning, you’ll be able to consult with him… and get feedback. 

“The Stuffed Peppers, Cabbage Rolls, Chinese Stir Fry etc… were good, could you make those again”

Hang in there, change can come slowly… but it can happen. 

Mr TTR & I have a couple friend, who’s Hubby who now eats a lot more variety (including veggies) than he did 10 years ago.  And he’s better off for it health wise… Besides now we all go out together to a lot more interesting Restaurants than we used to, in that his attitude is now more of “willing to try” and as a friend it is very refreshing to see him expand his horizons… AND know that we’ll have him around longer as well.

Hope this helps,


Post # 15
765 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

My husband is a pretty bad eater too. I tell him constantly he’s the reason I’m squishy ;-p

I hit up sparkpeople and weight watchers recipes. A LOT. And pinterest. When I find more “low fat” or healther recipes, I dont tell him. I just say “Oh wow honey I found this awesome chii/chicken/beef/pork/fish recipe. I’m gonna make it tonight.” I find that the more I talk about how “yummy” these sound the more he doesnt question things like “how many vegetables are in it?? I hate green vegetables” and other silly comments. Sometimes you need to be sneaky ;-p Sometimes its a hit, sometimes for him its a miss, but thats sort of half the fun.

Also, here’s a good trick to get the fast food habit under control since you work so much; on your day off (and yes I know its a little more work) make your meats for dinners for the week. I do this and its been really good to keep us on track. Then I buy frozen veggies and they take about 5 minutes to heat up in the microwave. A salad for me brown rice for him in the evenings and instand micorwave dinners without preservatives 🙂

Post # 16
1013 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@leenh78:  Wow, I’m so thankful for my DH who likes the healthier versions of food. He also does a lot of the cooking.


You can start by replacing some ingredients in his favorite foods with healthier ones, or cooking them differently.

1) Grill everything possible, it lets the fat drip out instead of cooking in it. Plus, pretty much everything tastes better grilled!

2) Use lean ground turkey to make tacos. With all the seasoning and toppings, the taste is not that different, and I actually prefer less greasy tacos.

3) Eat out less, even if you are still eating burgers… you have more control over what goes into them and portion size. And you can make something better than fries as a side. Home made chicken tenders are WAY better for you… and there is a recipie for “coconut pecan crusted chicken tenders” out on the web that the author claims even her picky eater kids love.

4) Make healthier desserts. Substitute applesauce for some of the oil. Make desserts with fruit, less sugar, and less crust. Use less icing.

5) 1-2x a week, make yourself the healthiest meal possible, even if he won’t eat it. Tell him he can have leftovers from the other meals if he will not eat what you have made because you want to have a healthy diet and you are the cook! (make sure there is enough for left overs the day before and do not put it on the table, instead put it away in the ‘fridge right after you finishe cooking it and plate the dinners).

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