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What kind of ideas has he come up with? Now I'm curious!!! Why don't you give him options... "I've been thinking about this OR that... what do you think?"
I think that you should pick two options of something that you like and then present them to him without telling him that you like both and whichever one he chooses use that one. You liked both of them from the beginning so it shouldnt be much of an adjustment.
I hope this helps!
KMSull this is an excellent idea. only 2 options. haha!
I'm curious too, what are his amusing ideas??
Oh boy some of his suggestions haha. I can't narrow down any in particular. Just suggesting colors that don't coordinate at all, suggesting very random reception venues (if you even wanna call them that) LOL. Just small things. It was hard to keep a straight face through some of them though! I could probably think of more, but don't wanna embarrass him too bad :]
My sweet, sweet fiance....Don't laugh too hard when you hear this. BUT he actually suggested having our reception at a local senior citizen building in town because it's "very pretty on the inside and spacious" LOL!!!! Try to keep a straight face when you imagine your FI saying that haha.
Honey, my manly-mechanic-hunter-outdoorsman FI wants a wedding wrapped in tulle and silk flowers. and I CANNOT convince him that is will look outdated and ridiculous.He thinks my pompoms, pocketfolds, and colored shoes are freakish :).
Yesterday his mom was showing us an example of a cupcake stand she made from a plate and a wine glass (where you glue them together?). I was like "yeah sure looks good." He spent ten minutes testing the balance of it and holding it up to fabric to see how many cupcakes we can put on it and if it will match the tablecloths. Unreal!
I think its great hes trying to be involved. Maybe just say oh great when he comes up with something and then show him what you thought. Maybe you can humor him by going to see one or two reception venues so maybe he will see that it wont work.
My husband did that during the planning too. I think he did this just so that he could feel like he was playing an active roll, but deep down he didn't really care :)
@ Appleblossom - That's hilarious! Sounds like something my fiance would do!!
@ Naangle55 - Don't get me wrong, I'm SO glad that he's putting so much interest into the planning, I just wish we were a little more on the same page. That's a good idea though, once we visit those places, he should realize they won't work!
@AnnieAAA - That's more than likely what he's doing, I mean a guy really doesn't care about flowers & stuff, surely. He's probably just trying to be a good fiance & I'm very thankful for that :)
Thank you all for the advice!
I'm in the exact same situation - I could have never imagined that he would be so involved in the details! I try to use his less out-there ideas as often as I can, or suggest modifications that would make them more acceptable. I don't have as much autonomy in the decisions as brides whose fiances don't care much/at all, but I think it's his wedding as much as mine, no matter who's been dreaming about it longer :)
If he's really excited about something that won't work though, I usually just tell him why it won't and include links from wedding websites that explain my point
My fiance is super involved, and I've learned how to compromise. The stuff I thought really mattered doesn't matter if my fiance feels left out and shuttled to the side. Just think about what huge help your fiance's going to be!
These are the things he's cared about so far whenever we've actually talked wedding stuff: the officient, the homily, the font on all the paper products (?!?!?!) and whether or not the food will be "Mr. KM friendly" (he's a pescatarian and not by choice).
@ GirlWithARing - That's a good point, I've let him have a pretty good say. Once we finally came to a decision on colors that actually go together, we narrowed it down to two options, 1) different shades of blue or 2) red & another color that we haven't decided yet. & I told him to pick because I was fine with either and he chose red. That seemed to make him pretty happy. I'm happy if he's happy, so it works. :]
Lol my fiance does this sometimes too! He thought we could just grab a $10 bag of silk petals for our 60 FOOT aisle!!
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The whole time we were dating, I always thought when we finally got engaged, he'd be the type that didn't want a major say in the planning part. Not that he wouldn't be into it, I just didn't figure he'd care less about colors, flowers, etc. However after finally getting engaged, I've discovered that is not the case. I'm very glad that he's taking such an interest in the wedding planning and showing excitement, however some of his suggestions really amuse me. Some of them have been almost laughable. I don't want to be rude and hurt his feelings, and I know it's his wedding too and I don't want to be one of those "this is my wedding, I'll decide everything" kind of girls. At the same time, a girl dreams of her wedding day MUCH longer than a guy thinks about his, and I've had several things invisioned about this day for my whole life. I want him to participate in this process as much as possible and I want this to be the most beautiful day of our lives. I just am not a fan of several of his suggestions!
Did any of you bees experience this with your fiances? & How can I gently break it to him when he suggests an idea that I don't like without hurting his feelings?