(Closed) My fiance doesn’t want the songs I chose for our ceremony (long)

posted 8 years ago in Music
Post # 3
Member
1580 posts
Bumble bee

These two songs can’t possibly be worth getting this upset over. And unfortunately these songs may be important to you, and you really want them, but the wedding is about what you both want as a couple. Maybe the compromise can be that you stick with classic music during the ceremony, but you get to play your songs at the reception. What kind of a reception are you having that he doesn’t want any music? That sounds a little strange to me.

Or, you can just not play the songs at the wedding, but then use them to put together a slideshow/movie of your wedding pictures. So everytime you look back at your wedding pictures or view the video you can hear the songs.

Post # 4
Member
1426 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

I would have to agree that I would find it odd to hear a pop song being played through a sound system at a wedding ceremony.  Could you maybe look into finding an instrumental version of these songs?  Some other bees have done that and it usually sounds much more traditional, but would still remind you of the songs you love.  Try looking them up on youtube to get some ideas.  But I do think you have to try to find something that the both of you will be comfortable with. The last thing you want is for him to be feeling awkward during the ceremony because he’s worried about these songs being played.  Don’t worry too much about it, you still have lots of time to fall in love with a new vision. (I’ve had to do that several times throughout wedding planning!)

Also, no music at all during the reception?  Were you planning on doing something besides dinner and dancing? I think this is a separate issue about what the two of you want as a reception.

Post # 5
Member
1426 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

p.s. I just saw that you don’t think you could find anyone to play these songs– my musicians had a clause in the contract which said they would be willing to learn a song for an extra fee, or maybe you could find a recorded version since you were going to play a recording anyway.

Post # 6
Member
1051 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

I agree that maybe you can find another way to incorporate your fav pop music into your wedding, and I think during a slideshow is a wonderful idea.  For the ceremony, I think the most important part would be to find a song you can both agree to.  Maybe the 2 of you can ste aside an hour a few nights a week to listen to some songs of a genre you don’t know as much about and find something together?  You’d be surprised at the breadth of “classical” music out there, your hesitation is probably hinging on a lack of exposure.

Also, if you were to hire a string quartet, they would NOT be playing a lot of “pop” songs.  They’d likely not play any at all unless it was your request.  Also, you don’t need to handpick each piece.  You can either just let them chose or give them some pieces you like and they can device a play list based around that.  Just an FYI.

Post # 8
Member
1426 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

I went to a reception like that once and they had soft music playing in the background, like you might find at a restaurant.  I think they did a mix of old standards, Frank Sinatra and the like… it was nice.

I think your video idea is a really good compromise!

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