- 7 years ago
- Wedding: May 2011
A few weeks ago, my fiance and I went to his cousin’s wedding. Everything went as planned…we helped with decorations, lit candles, un-froze punch, and finally sat down together in the ceremony. Of course everything went seemlessly, until the bride started walking down the aisle. I couldn’t tell from the front of the church, but her dress seemed oddly familiar. When she finally got to the alter and we were seated, my FI turned to me and whispered, “******’s dress is ugly.”
Little did he know that her dress is the same as MY dress! Granted, a terribly done knockoff of my dress, but my dress all the same. I was completely brokenhearted. I texted his mom after the wedding, nearly hyperventilating trying to tell the news. She talked to me for a long time about it later and convinced me (temporarily) that it was okay.
For the last couple of months now, I’ve been quietly trying to convince myself that he wouldn’t be able to tell that our dresses are alike and that it would be okay. That is…until last night. He and I were talking on Facebook, and he mentioned looking at his cousin’s photos, saying that the dress looker better than he thought! I breathed a HUGE sigh of relief and we moved on to talking about my shoes and whether or not they would go with my dress. I vaguely mentioned that my shoes didn’t have to be elaborate because my dress had enough happening!
Then he said, “As long as you stay away from Meredith’s dress, you’ll be fine! ;)” And then sent me a picture of a dress he did like.
That, fellow bees, is when the floodgates opened. I started E-yelling about how, “What if my dress was like hers?” “What would I do about it now?” I probably confused him to death wondering why I was yelling at him for no good reason. He got offline, and I cried and cried and cried, and then after I had cried some more, I texted him to tell him I was going to send him a picture of my dress. He was shocked and told me, “No way!” Then it dawned on him…he had said something horribly wrong.
Of course he came over later to find me lying in a bed of my own sad, sad heartbrokenness (and tissues). He was very good about consoling me and telling me that he was sorry and it didn’t matter…but something is still keeping me from getting over it. Maybe it’s the fact that he basically knows what my dress looks like before I ever got the chance to wear it. Maybe it’s that some part of me is still scared that even though there are differences in our dresses, that he will dislike mine as much as hers. Either way, I’m at a loss.
He wants me to keep my dress because it is a representation of who I am, and that is who he loves. If I get another dress, it won’t be me. He told me that he would be sad if I chose to get a new one based on the fact that he didn’t like a bad knockoff version of mine. But…I hate knowing that he won’t be surprised at all when he sees me in my dress for the first time.
To get a new dress, to not get a new dress? That is the question.