Post # 1
Okay, so my fiance was just told two days ago he will be sent out of town for 9 months, for a job. We knew it would come sometime, we just hadn’t thought too much about it because we didn’t like the thought. Now that he will be leaving in 2 weeks we are considering going with him. By we, I mean, our son, and I. We just can’t imagine only seeing eachother once a month for a weekend. So we’re stuck between a rock and a hard place. BTW, our son is only 19 months, so stability is great, but he isn’t in school yet so we are somewhat free to go anywhere at this point.I’m not sure what we should do. Here’s a few options,
1) Move in with him where he is going, rent a furnished place, and pay someone to takecare of our home ( mow lawn, pick up newspapers, mail, etc).
2) Move in with him, sell our house so we don’t have mortgage plus rent in another city to worry about. He does get alloway (spelling?) but it has decreased in the last few years, so living expenses could be out of pocket. Its a long story….
3)Stay at home, and wait to see him. The company promises every 2 weeks he can come home, but we know with the busy work schedule it will be more like every month, if that.
4)Stay at home for 2 weeks, and then go see him for 2 weeks, and go back and forth, with our son in tow.
There are pros and cons to each decision and I really have to no clue what to do, or what is our best option.
What would you do?
Post # 3
How far are we talking? If it’s somewhere within driving distance then I think option 4 may work out the best for you. If we’re talking like a plane ride then I would probably go with option 1, if you can afford that. I don’t think I would consider selling my home unless this move was going to be permanent.
Post # 4
Can you rent out your place through a service that finds someone reliable etc? If so than choice one would be taken care of already.
I say one if you can find a service to find someone financially stable, great credit, and reliable etc.
Otherwise I say four. I will vote once I see if you can do the above. 🙂
Post # 5
So by going back and forth, I mean by plane. the drive would only be about 12 hours, but far too long for a 19 month old, every 2 weeks, there and back. So it isn’t that far, but far enough that it feels like he is a million miles away.
As for the renting a furnished suite, that is great, but like I said the alloway ( spelling?) doesn’t allow for much, so we would be limited, as we don’t have a whole lot of extra money because our mortage at home, which leads to option number 2.
I really don’t want to sell, as it isn’t permenant. However, he might go out of town again after the nine months, we really don’t know, there doesn’t seem to be much development where we are currently, and everything seems to be further away from home, work wise.
Post # 6
A similar thing happened to us, we found a property management company that rented out our house while we were gone and it worked out great! The rent almost covered our mortgage, and since it was short term anyway we were happy. They found a really great family to rent our place, and took care of all the details!
I always think that if you own property, it’s best to hang on to it- but that’s just my opinion 🙂 I may think that way because I live in Southern California where property is pretty expensive to buy!
Post # 7
Okay so we have thought about the option to rent it out as well. Our situation is that we are undergoing some renos at the moment,think unfinished floor level bathroom, new furniture being delivered few weeks after we leave, and we are a bit out of city center, so finding a temp renter might prove to be difficult.
Post # 8
Ok, I say keep it then. Do you have a single friend that wouldn’t mind staying there? I had a gf go to Costa Rica for work and I kept the place up while she was away so it worked out well bc I only paid bills for what I used, no rent, she knew her home was safe.
Is that an option?
Hope these questions help and not add to your stress level. 🙂
Post # 9
Renting out for only 9 months will be difficult, unless it falls into the academic year and you don’t mind renting to college students.
A friend of mine rented out his house, originally for a year, and moved in with a relative to save some money, and has had trouble getting the renters out after the lease expired. The tenants are a young couple and she got pregnant during the rent time and decided they could not move out under any circumstances. Tenant laws in MA make it almost impossible to get a tenant out of your property. Maybe it’s easier in Canada, I don’t know.
Post # 10
Honestly? I say just stay at home. I’ve been long distance with DH for the past 2 years and we see each other for a week or two every 3 or 4 months because he is stationed in another state. It sucks, but it’s only temporary. 9 months isn’t very long, in the scope of things. Plus, you’ll get to see him every month. Skype is a wonderful thing.
Post # 11
My husband works out of state every year from March-September, and he does NOT get to come home at all. Unfortunately he is not in the same place for more than 3-4 days, so I have to look at his schedule and work out times to come down.
For instance, last week he was in Lexington for 5 days, so I drove the 7 hours there and spent the whole week with him. He will be back in Lexington for 4 days next week, so I am driving back again.
Sometimes it sucks, but we make it work. We Skype every few days, and it works really, really well. You’ll figure it all out!
Post # 12
I know this will be hard but I say to stay at home and I dont think you should spend all that money flying back in forth every week to see eachother. I cannot imagine seeing DH only every month but it is only for 9 months. you can do this. you dont want to put yourself in financial trouble for this. also, are you a stay at home mom or do you work outside fo the home? just curious because of having to quit your job to leave. and as someone else suggested SKYPE! it will make a huge difference. good luck
Post # 13
oh, and i dont recommend putting your son through the stress of traveling to see him a lot. that is a lot for a 19 month old since it is not neccessary
Post # 14
Thanks for the advice everyone. Everybody here has great points, and I really took everything into consideration. For now we ( our son and I ) are going to go with my fiance to the other city, and be there with him. We ( my son and I ) may, or may not travel back and forth, and have a neighbor look after our house for us while we are away.
Our son is very close to his father, so it just made sense to go wherever he goes, to keep our family close together.
If this plan fails down the road, then we’ll regroup, and do whatever change is necessary at the moment. Thanks again, ladies, you always are the best 🙂
Post # 15
I’d look into leasing your current home out. Check out a property management company locally and see if it’s possible. You may have to put some of your stuff or furniture in storage for that time but atleast you could make some $$.