- 5 years ago
- Wedding: March 2013
There have been several frustrations along the way, in this whole wedding planning journey. That is to be expected, right? I’m sure I’m not the only one who is not all smiles and rainbows over the process…
Thus far I have managed not to have *too* many freak outs, and the ones I have had have been quite mild.
Our wedding ceremony plans have gone something like this: elope to New Orleans, Destination Wedding in New Orleans, Big Fat Family Wedding, small and fun family wedding at a theme park, elope to New Orleans, and finally, small family wedding at a beautiful Victorian house.
I love my venue, I love that I have to keep it under 100 (we’re shooting for no more than 50). I love that it will be small enough that I can make my own fun centerpieces and add our own personal touches to make this day truly about our relationship and our family.
We have our reasons for wanting a small wedding (it is LITERALLY parents, grandparents, siblings, my aunt, and 5 close friend couples at this point – no more). We don’t want to spend like crazy on food, we only want those closest to us in attendance, and we want to keep costs down so our honeymoon budget is high enough that we can just go, have a good time, and not worry about expenses.
Yesterday Future Mother-In-Law calls my darling fiance…she does this several times a week asking the same questions – when is the wedding, do you need me to do anything?
I always roll my eyes at the “when is the wedding” question because it has been set for MONTHS. I do find it very nice that she is offering help, because my own mother hasn’t even asked a single question about the wedding at all.
Ok, enough background I think, here is the vent…
So in that call she says, “We’ve (meaning her and her ex husband, my FFIL) spoken to the family in LargeCity and they are all so excited about coming to the wedding. Ok. The “family in LargeCity” means cousins and aunts/uncles my fiance has not seen in, at the least a year, at the most, like 4 years. We are not planning to invite them.
Mother-In-Law says, “Well, you can’t NOT invite them.”
(We sure can NOT invite them…since it’s OUR wedding)
I’ve sort of coached Fiance on this, you know, the old “tell them we’re watching the budget, our venue is small” kind of stuff…but he says, “We can’t afford to feed all those people.” (not true)
Of course she then offers to pay for all of the food so that they can come. (rookie mistake on his part, what can I say? LOL)
Then he has to back pedal, and mentions our smaller venue. She then offers to pay for a larger venue.
She actually said, “I will pick the food and venue and send out the invitations if you want.”
I appreciate the sentiment, I really do. I genuinely believe she feels she is taking stress away rather than piling it on. But this is our wedding. Our small, precious wedding that I’ve finally gotten excited about planning.
She wants to invite about 150 EXTRA people (no exaggeration) to our wedding because they are important to her. Well, that’s really special and everything, but I am not inviting people we do not even know to our wedding.
PLUS she is getting married herself this June. She can invite those people to HER wedding (which she has changed the date of SIX times in the last four months).
Ugh. Anyway, thank you if you read this whole long mess, which might not even make sense, I just sort of threw words down just to get them out of my own head.
I told my fiance to just blame it all on me, LOL, or if she has questions to just call me. Plans are made, they are set, too bad so sad. No changes at this point. She just frustrates the hell out of me sometimes.