- 8 years ago
- Wedding: October 2010
For all extents and purposes, my Future Mother-In-Law is a wonderful person. She’s sweet and kind and generous, and has welcomed me into her family without reservation.
But she’s reaaaallly starting to tick me off.
I started collecting addresses for our wedding in January. I asked my mom, and my fmil, for a list of family addresses, and any close friends of theirs they wanted to invite. I got two lists, which I used to send Save-The-Date Cards in April.
I got a lot of bounce-backs from addresses on my FI’s side, so I emailed his mother, his father, and finally, his sister in succession to try and get the addresses corrected before we needed to send invitations.
So now it’s August. My Fiance and I mailed our invitations this afternoon. All except for the pile of invitations that are either still awaiting their proper addresses. Or the stack that I found out yesterday are going to couples that have divorced. Or the stack for people that I found out yesterday have moved.
That she’s known about, but hasn’t bothered to tell us about.
Fiance and I have been asking her for addresses literally every day for the last two weeks, and every time we’ve been down to visit over the last two months. She knows very well where we’ve been in the process (we’re printing! we’re stuffing! today we bought stamps!) so it would be NO surprise that we need to send them out, and send them out soon, as they’re already kinda late.
I feel really disrespected by her inability to spend 15 minutes going through her address book for her son and I. It seems like such a little thing, but this has been something we’ve been open and assertive and tried our hardest to keep her in the loop about. My parent’s are paying for the majority of our wedding (and what they haven’t paid for, Fiance and I have) and FI’s family has a lot more guests than mine does. I know it’s not the guest’s fault at all, but it ticks me off that I have to write a bunch of new invitations — and order more, whoopie — for people that are costing my parent’s effectively $50 a head, because my fmil can’t get off her butt and call or email my Fiance or I.
Second point of frustration: it’s AUGUST. We’re 6 weeks away from the wedding. And she hasn’t organized anything about the rehearsal dinner. In fact, the last time I talked to her about it, she said she’d probably call my mom and have her look around for her, and maybe just a pizza place, because they (FFIL and FMIL) are kinda strapped for cash. OKAY. First of all, my mom is already completely stressed out. The rehearsal dinner has always been my FI’s family’s responsibility; this is something we arranged when we got engaged A YEAR AGO. And speaking of, she has a year to plan and save for this thing. Now, I’ve got nothing aqainst a pizza parlor, but seriously, don’t cop out and try to pass this off on my parents 6 weeks before the wedding because you didn’t have the foresight to save just a little for your son’s wedding.
(I would have less of an issue about the money thing, but I know his parent’s just dumped at least $200 on their sailboat, and have it completely in their power to pay for a nice, but informal, rehearsal dinner for not a lot of people…they just don’t want to.)
Seriously, lady, get your act together. Open and phone book. Get online. Make a few phone calls and stop trying to make this my mom’s problem.
I am oddly more angry for having written this than I was before. </vent>