(Closed) My friend took a picture of my engagement ring !!! And is going to show everyone

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
1545 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

i never heard of that either? did she say why she wanted to take a picture? did you show her your hand and she took the picture or did she take the picture when you werent looking?

No one has took a picture of just my ring but when we got engagement we had a house warming party and everyone that was there did create an album on myspace and/or FB that said our engagement/housewarming. there were no close up of my ring but a lot of pictures of me flashing it. i didnt mind but no pictures of just my ring. in fact no one really ask to takea picture of just my ring.

 

Post # 4
Member
636 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

Kind of odd, but I don’t know.  My mom’s best friend’s daughter got engaged recently and she took a pic of her ring on her phone to show me because it was a beautiful ring in an interesting style and she thought I’d want to see.  The girl put her hand out and let my mom take the pic to show me.  Did you know your friend was taking the pic or did she do it secretively?  She probably just knows people will ask about your ring and wanted a pic.  Why would you be upset if she showed people? 

Post # 5
Member
2704 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

that’s bizarre. if it really bothers you, id def say you ask her to delete it and not make it public…

again, weird…

Post # 6
Member
573 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

Ask her to keep it underwraps. Let her know that you want to be able to show people in person, and that you feel uncomfortable having people who don’t personally know you see your ring.

(vent: what is with people who take pics of everything and show them around? no I don’t want all your FB friends to see me getting ready, andyou shouldn’t post them with a note that says “If you see pics of yoruself that you’d rather not have posted, just email me and I’ll take them downs =)”  agh!)

Post # 7
Member
5773 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2011

I’ve definitely taken pictures of my friends engagement rings before and I never thought it would upset anyone. She was probably just excited/happy for you. If it does bother you that much I would say something to her.

Post # 8
Member
11328 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2011

I don’t really think its that odd. My friends tried my ring on and took pics of them wearing it! haha. 

Why are you concerned about her showing it around? Do you think people won’t be surprised if they see the pic first… i assure you that pics never do justice to the ring!

Post # 9
Member
3872 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I think it is odd.  If it bothers you, I would tell her that you are sort of taking the thunder and the excitement away from telling everyone that you are engaged.

Tell her that you understand that she happy for you but you would prefer to tell people yourself.

I mean I was really excited my close friend got engaged and I put it on facebook but I only said.  “My friend, Tiffany, just got engaged.  I’m so happy for her.”  Definitely wouldn’t take a picture of her ring and show everyone it.

 

Post # 10
Member
860 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I don’t think it’s weird at all.  But it doesn’t matter what I think.  If it bothers you, tell her that you would rather show people your ring and would appreciate it if she didn’t show the pic around.

Post # 11
Member
204 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

OP, I understand, because this is almost like a case of her “stealing your thunder”. I would feel a little “violated” haha. Just tell her the truth. Tell her it bothers you and please delete it.

Remember “Friends” when Rachel slept with Ross just before Monica’s and Chandler’s engagement party? Don’t let anyone else steal your thunder 🙂

Post # 12
Member
343 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

THAT HAPPENED TO ME!!!  It made me so mad.  It’s not my style to flash my ring or post pictures of it on FB, not my style at ALL.  So right after I got engaged, a friend of mine took pictures of it.  I didn’t even want her to, I was like “stop! stop!” and she GRABBED my hand and took a picture — I’m even pulling away and covering my face in the picture!!  Then she posts it onto FB after I change my status to “engaged.”  I hadn’t even told everyone about the engagement yet, there was no notification to everyone when I changed my status.

I found it REEAALLLLLY embarassing and not my personal style to post pictures of my ring.  So I asked her to take the pics down, and she laughed me off!  Then I sent her an email telling her how it made me feel, and it might sound silly to her, but please take them down.  SHE NEVER DID!!

I’m still not over it, her behavior really hurt my feeling and I felt violated.  We’re not really friends anymore.  It isn’t about the ring pics, it’s about her complete lack of regard for my feelings on such a personal & sensitive subject.  I didn’t even invite her to my wedding, and I had definitely planned to!!

I totally feel you on this… I think you should ask your friend to delete the pis ASAP!  Hopefully she will respond better than my friend did.  🙁

Post # 13
Member
1510 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I think that is weird and inappropriate too.  I actually do not show pictures of my ring to anyone since I feel like its such a private thing since it represents the promise my fiance made to me.  I wear my ring all the time and it definitely shows up in pictures, but I just think that a picture of the ring alone (aside from the photography done at the wedding with all 3 rings) is just not something I like. 

Post # 14
Member
1154 posts
Bumble bee

I think it’s a little silly to be upset over it.  Are you genuinely upset or is your mom and you working yourself up to being upset?  If you are genuinely upset I guess there’s no harm in a “hey, please don’t share the ring pic with anyone for now!” to your gf but if you can wave it away I would.  You feel the way you feel and it’s okay to be slightly irrational about things – but if you do ask her to delete it I’d be careful not to imply that she did anything wrong.

Nothing will happen if she puts it on facebook.  Why would anything happen?  I do think it unlikely she will post it or forward it to everyone – that’s a lot of effort for someone else’s ring.

Post # 15
Member
38 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2010

That sort of happened to me, too. My FI proposed the night before a huge snowstorm, and I ended up being snowed in for a couple of days. BUT, of course I sent a pic to my bff (who I also work with) to show her because I couldn’t wait. Well, the next time I came in to work, everyone already knew and she had shown them the pic and everything! I was pretty mad, because I had just spent two days getting all excited about how I was going to tell everyone…but really, I got over it pretty quick, and I had actually forgotten about it until I read this post.

Post # 16
Member
75 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

A few of my friends have asked to take pictures of my ring, I didn’t mind it, but if they had put it on Facebook, I could see being annoyed.  Then again, that is kind of a danger that comes with the territory of social networking.

A few strangers have actually asked to take a picture of my ring because they had never seen anything like it.  A little random, but I happily obliged.

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