(Closed) My grandfather always said…

posted 8 years ago in Full Figured
Post # 3
Member
2006 posts
Buzzing bee

It is very sweet that he made you feel better!! Women are beautiful at any size and shape as long as they are healthy Laughing

But, um, I am naturally really thin so that phrase actually stings a little for me Embarassed

Post # 4
Member
202 posts
Helper bee

Awww, what a good guy!

Post # 5
Member
14186 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

That’s nice your grandpa said that to you and it made you feel better but I do think it’s mean to thinner women and probably is something you should keep to yourself since it can be hurtful.

Post # 6
Member
4765 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2011 - Vintage Villas

I have to agree with ejs and babyboo – It’s great that your grandfather was so sweet, and I’m so glad he was able to help you have self-confidence, but as a thin person, it’s a bit hurtful to see that. 

Post # 7
Member
1854 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

I’m thin. Not hurt. I think it’s funny and cool that he put a smile on your face. All women have issues with the way they look, and ladies, keep in mind that full figured people often have to put up with way more crap than that cute phrase that her grandfather said!

Post # 8
Member
581 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2015

That’s really cute!!

Post # 9
Member
2006 posts
Buzzing bee

@egb: many of the women in my family are larger and when I hear comments against women who are bigger I also speak out. It is about making ALL women feel beautiful, not making one group feel better while putting down another 🙂

Like I said to the OP, I am glad this statement made her feel better. Every woman deserves to feel happy about herself. I just don’t think it was a correct statement to share with such a large, diverse group of women.

Post # 10
Member
1854 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

Yeah.. but she did post in “full figured” to share with other full figured women that could smile at it.
I see your point though, about making everyone feel good; but I feel like a way to feel good is also to not always take things so seriously and be able to laugh at ourselves and have humour..

Post # 11
Member
2289 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

I have to say, I agree with egb. As a woman who is in between “thin” and “full figured”, I think it’s important to take the comment in the spirit in which it was intended 🙂

Post # 12
Member
293 posts
Helper bee

I am glad that the OP felt better – feeling beautiful in your skin is priceless, and certainly not easy to come by at any size.

I do have to say though that the amount of negative remarks made lately with regard to *thin* women is surprising and disappointing.  I certainly didn’t expect to see that here on WB . . . nor did I expect that it would be passed off as *harmless* or (dare I say) *socially* acceptable.

If the situation here had been reversed as to the Grandfather’s saying (that the saying made a negative inference about a fuller-figured woman), I am sure the response would have been entirely different, and definitely not accepted.

Post # 13
Member
14186 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

I bet plus sized women wouldn’t appreciate it if a skinny woman went on a “skinny board” and posted about how men don’t like fuller sized women.

Or if I said, “men like boobs! Not pecs!” cuz i have boobs. See, i could say that but i think that’s an insensitive thing to say. And it’s not true! Even on a pro-boob board that is frequented by women of all shapes and sizes. I’m using boobs as my example because I don’t want to be derogatory towards fuller sized women.

I guess I feel like making yourself feel better at the expense of others isn’t the right way to be pro-whatever you are. =

@MissCosmo, jinx!

Post # 14
Member
293 posts
Helper bee

@egb – I don’t think that it is okay to post negative comments about a generalized group of individuals on any board.  The intended audience doesn’t make the underlying meaning any less negative or offensive.

Post # 15
Member
2006 posts
Buzzing bee

@MissCosmo: Thank you. I in no way wanted to make the OP feel bad. And do have a sense of humor about myself (I’m the clumsiest person I know and I fall right into those “dumb blonde” jokes). I just know that if this comment were reversed there would be a lot more people upset and no one would think it was ” cute.”

But I do apologize, because I didn’t realize this was written in the Full-Figured board when I responded.

Post # 16
Member
293 posts
Helper bee

@BabyBoo:  You’re more than welcome.  I have been biting my proverbial tongue lately and not responding to posts and posters where there have been negative expressions and comments regarding *thin* women, whether the *thin* women are an unidentified general group of people or models in ads for wedding gowns.   

And as for having a sense of humor, I don’t think anyone would ask a woman who felt slighted by a comment directed at her weight or size (a fuller-figured woman) to find her sense of humor and to learn to laugh at herself. 

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